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Question for men in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s etc. What are men in their
twenties not considering that they should be considering?
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|u/tavariusbukshank - 1 month
|
|Take your hearing more seriously. Wear protection or you will be in
|your fifties and slowly being driven insane by the constant high
|pitched tone.
|u/lazy-but-talented - 1 month
|
|people rag on me for having old man earbuds at concerts or fireworks
|but I love music too much to have damaged hearing I want to be able
|to listen as long as possible in high quality
|u/GoodFaithConverser - 1 month
|
|I have plenty of friends who deeply regret not caring. Tinnitus
|isn’t fun, can come from just 1 too loud event, and there’s no real
|cure in sight. Edit: due to a little attention, I'll recommend
|simple ear plugs from any hardware store. They cost nothing, can be
|stored in any tiny container that fit in your pocket, and take 5-10
|sec to put in - and you can 100% still enjoy the music. Take a few
|moments to save yourself a hassle from hearing aids etc. in the
|future.
|u/kungfuabuse - 1 month
|
|This is me, unfortunately. I went to countless shows in my late
|teens through early twenties without hearing protection. I've
|grown used to the high-pitched whine and it isn't necessarily
|noticeable unless I'm in a quiet place, but it's always there as
|a reminder I didn't wear earplugs when I should have.
|u/Crackheadwithabrain - 1 month
|
|Imagine living in a Hispanic home where the normal Is kids
|being so tired of their parents partying that we even fall
|asleep next to loud speakers. I got people telling me it's
|no big deal, it's not that serious, IT HAPPENED TO THEM and
|they're fine so it must be ok.... like no. Every once In a blue
|moon I'll have a little tinnitus episode. Pretty sure those
|parties damaged me smh
|u/Doogos - 1 month
|
|I got mine working at Comcast as a support agent. A lady
|screamed in my ear so loudly I passed out with my ear bleeding.
|It was never the same and this tinnitus has driven me crazy for
|nearly 15 years now. If I didn't have my kids I would have
|offed myself by now. I said I'd do it at 30 but I had my
|daughter at 27 and my son at 29. They're worth the suffering
|u/BigNutzWow - 1 month
|
|This is me too. My wife always wore earplugs at concerts and I
|used to laugh. I’m 60 now and all I hear is eeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
|u/chomu_lal - 1 month
|
|That's scary man.
|u/NippleSauce - 1 month
|
|I'm not even 30 and have tinnitus. Granted, it's the result of a
|severe traumatic brain injury from a partial slip n slide
|attempt... So, hearing loss was to be expected... However,
|there is a slight mental cure to tinnitus and it has done wonders
|for me in the past. In fact, my tinnitus started acting up again
|these past few days. So, I am going to have to try reducing it
|again this weekend. Basically, wear noise cancelling
|headphones or earbuds for a few hours each day/night. You can
|listen to audio whilst doing this. The inverse audio from the
|noise cancellation feature will cause the ringing in your ears to
|amplify. However, doing this consistently for days on end will
|cause your brain to start ignoring that continuous
|humming/ringing due to its perceived increased amplitude. It
|won't fully vanish, however, it will certainly quiet down to the
|point where it is no longer distracting. And if it stays that
|way for a long period of time (for days or even weeks), your mind
|will eventually start to ignore whatever humming you can still
|notice. For reference, I have always studied medical practices
|for fun. I actually learned about this method from a medical
|study that I had read a few years back. So, if you decide to
|give this a shot and do so for a week straight at night time, I
|wouldn't recommend listening to music. There have been other
|studies that show that music in the evening can and will disrupt
|your body's ability to sleep normally. And continuous sleep
|disruption can cause a slew of other problems... I have tested
|this (as well as numerous other medical studies) on myself and
|found it to be true.
|u/ResponsiblePumpkin60 - 1 month
|
|Good to know. I’ll try it
|u/TheSpeakEasyGarden - 1 month
|
|Thanks for sharing. I've been dealing with tinnitus for several
|months now after my toddler blasted me in the ear. Now I just
|need to figure out what noise cancelling headphones to get. I'm
|going to try this.
|u/evolution9673 - 1 month
|
|I’ve thought about taking a drill bit to my ears to get it to
|stop.
|u/Terrible-Use-4415 - 1 month
|
|It's worth noting that it doesnt matter if you are drowning in 7
|feet of water or 1000 feet of water. Grief, trauma, burnout all
|add up. Get help, find modalities that work and dont compare your
|human experience to others and think for a second you shouldnt
|feel a certain way. That being said, learn to find gratitude and
|practice it and it will help your perspective.
|u/lazy-but-talented - 1 month
|
|I recently learned that a major signal for mental burnout is
|having many things to be grateful for yet feeling conflicted
|about current position or status. This could happen from seeing
|the suffering of others personally or on the news or through
|media, and thinking well my life isn’t that bad in comparison I
|should stick it out even when unhappy or feeling depression. Yet
|that feeling gets pushed to the side in order to feel sympathy
|for others without resolution so there’s a cycle of negative
|feeling + nonresolution = burnout.  Just a thought connecting
|your comment to something I read about recently 
|u/hoppy1478 - 1 month
|
|Born with mild tinnitus so this is just what quiet sounds like to me.
|u/Eternal_Bagel - 1 month
|
|It was a surprise to me to learn some folks don’t hear that growing
|eeeeeeeeeeee tone when things get really quiet 
|u/No-Pollution-721 - 1 month
|
|That's not normal???
|u/Sevenfootschnitzell - 1 month
|
|Honestly don’t look into it. Lol. It’s better when it’s just
|your “normal”. It’s been my normal my whole life. Just watch
|your loud noise exposures over time.
|u/uttermybiscuit - 1 month
|
|Facts. And don't do that "trick" that makes it go away
|because it'll just come back and you'll notice it way more
|after that
|u/yogopig - 1 month
|
|No it is. Nearly every person in the entire world has some
|amount of tinnitus. Hearing damage makes it worse so that you
|start always hearing it.
|u/Every-Win-7892 - 1 month
|
|Seriously, what? This buzzing around me in a quiet setting isn't
|real?
|u/Internub - 1 month
|
|Same, never experienced silence once in my life
|u/chaos_almighty - 1 month
|
|I had tinnitus for as long as I could remember, most likely from
|chicken pox. I had my tonsils removed when I was 22 and I didn't
|have tinnitus anymore. It was fucking wild.
|u/DanNZN - 1 month
|
|Same but then I got COVID and now I get what I call super tinnitus
|which comes and goes. It is ten times louder and no longer just in
|the background.
|u/waiveofthefuture - 1 month
|
|It also makes having conversations with others difficult. I know an
|older gentleman and his hearing isn't good anymore. I like him but I
|don't enjoy talking to him because I get a "Huh?" after everything I
|say, even when I'm speaking loudly. Protect your hearing. It doesn't
|come back.
|u/These_Truth_6982 - 1 month
|
|I can assure you that he doesn’t enjoy you talking either. I try
|and avoid all social events and even time with my family because
|not being able to hear is so frustrating and you know people are
|frustrated having to repeat every thing they say. I’m most at
|peace when I avoid it all together.
|u/IGotAFatRooster - 1 month
|
|It’s funny because I huh people all the time and have perfect
|hearing. A lot of people are low confidence and tend to talk
|ridiculously quiet. I can’t stand talking to those types of people.
|Speak tf up
|u/Expat1989 - 1 month
|
|I’m 35 and had a hearing test done last year after a nasty ear
|infection. Fortunately both ears are still well in the normal
|hearing range with the one ear slightly lower due that ear
|infection. I have had to ask people to speak up and put a hand
|to my ear because they’re talking so quietly. Drives me nuts
|because I know for a fact my hearing is good.
|u/tatasabaya - 1 month
|
|Too late, I should've read that advice in my 10s lol
|u/WestCoastBestCoast01 - 1 month
|
|Yeah this was great advice when I was under 15 lol
|u/Fit-University1070 - 1 month
|
|I'm 37 and have serious tinnitus and want to jam pencils and shatter
|my ear drums daily. It literally makes me want to off myself. This is
|a great one to bring up.
|u/not-my-real-name-kk - 1 month
|
|Hey so take the old joke seriously. “If I fall in love with my
|anxiety maybe it will leave me”. When my random tinnitus kicks in
|I think to myself “ah hello old friend, where have you been?” It
|helps a great deal.
|u/ElenaBlackthorn - 1 month
|
|Supposedly tinnitus doesn’t evn originate in your ears. It
|originates in your BRAIN.
|u/Fearlessleader85 - 1 month
|
|I have some narrow frequency hearing loss thanks to some extremely
|loud equipment i worked with a bunch. It's not that bad and a very
|small range, but it's still obnoxious. Now i have ear plugs in all my
|vehicles and a pair in my pocket about 70% of the time i leave the
|house, plus a big tube of them in my shop. I use them the instant
|something is kindcof uncomfortably loud, and it's helped a lot.
|u/REUBG58 - 1 month
|
|That's one of my great regrets. Used to blast music in my
|headphones, developed tinnitus, then hearing started going bad in my
|40s. Now have hearing aids.
|u/BodyEuphoric - 1 month
|
|Very true i wish someone told me that listening to loud music
|especially using earphones damage hearing and you spend rest of your
|life hearing high pitched eeeeeeeee
|u/Bloorajah - 1 month
|
|I skirted this suggestion by going mostly deaf in my teens for
|unknown reasons
|u/Gnome_0 - 1 month
|
|true, from going to concerts and making the stupid decision in my 20s
|to stay in front of 2-meter speakers to "feel" the music, now 35 have
|partial hearing loss on my left ear and tinnitus
|u/toastedmarsh - 1 month
|
|My family was very “deal with it like a man” so using earplugs,
|gloves, lift with legs or really any ppe means you’re a pussy. Now
|I’m 28 with severe eczema on my hands, a ringing periodically in both
|ears, Vision starting to get blurry, and back and neck constantly
|sore. Save yourself and use ppe.
|u/StillSmiling719 - 1 month
|
|From someone who spent many years working with their hands. I want to
|add kneepads and safety glasses when you work.
|u/dumpsterfarts15 - 1 month
|
|I work as a range officer at a gun range. WEAR YOUR EAR PRO!
|u/I_am_That_Ian_Power - 1 month
|
|I have a cure for Tinnitus, Eye Movement Desensitization. Tinnitus
|free for Four years, Eight months and Fourteen days. Was a 20 year
|sufferer.
|u/basedlandchad27 - 1 month
|
|Your post still works if you remove the first sentence.
|u/TurtleneckTrump - 1 month
|
|Try 30's. Some drunk piece of shit yelled in my ear at a club
|u/vacri - 1 month
|
|I got some active noise cancelling headphones a little while back.
|They were amazing, and even cut out the sound of the big truck idling
|outside. Sweet sweet silence - nothing in here but me and my
|tinnitus!
|u/Sevenfootschnitzell - 1 month
|
|Some of us have been lucky enough to get it during childhood so we
|have lifelong training to deal with ringing. Lol
|u/rasmorak - 1 month
|
|All my life I have had the unfortunate high pitched whine of
|tinnitus. Silence drives me FUCKING INSANE. I CANNOT sleep without
|some sort of fairly loud white noise.
|u/idunnoiforget - 1 month
|
|I've had the constant high pitched noise my whole life. Even when I
|was a kid I remember hearing it if in a quiet room. I thought
|everyone could hear it when it's quiet. I will live my life never
|having heard true silence
|u/argella1300 - 1 month
|
|Your skin too. Wear sunscreen daily and reapply it in the middle of
|the day
|u/CityOutlier - 1 month
|
|Maintaining platonic relationships. It gets way harder to make new
|friends when you're older.
|u/esoteric_enigma - 1 month
|
|This is real. I'm in my mid 30s and have not made new close friends
|since college. We all scattered after graduation so I see them maybe
|once a year when I visit. I have acquaintances and whatnot to go do
|things with but I really wish I had a group of good friends here in
|my city.
|u/WeirdJawn - 1 month
|
|My newest friendship that I've maintained is from when I was 14. 
|u/esoteric_enigma - 1 month
|
|That isn't a problem if you haven't moved. I know plenty of
|people whose whole circle is family and friends they've known
|since high school or before.
|u/Mathilliterate_asian - 1 month
|
|As seen somewhere on reddit - "maintaining friendship is another
|job. You have to make an effort to keep it going". Maybe the word
|job isn't the right one for the saying, but seriously you need to
|actively keep it alive. I've had so many friendships fall apart,
|especially after the late 20s when people start having kids. You
|just start moving apart, especially as a guy with no kids.
|u/esoteric_enigma - 1 month
|
|I still have my old friendships. They just aren't local. It's
|making new friends as a man that has been difficult for me.
|u/Rex_felis - 1 month
|
|Best of luck g. I'm working on the same. Just linked up with one of
|my homies from highschool. He lives in another country now. We see
|each other maybe once a year. When my money is right maybe I'll be
|able to fly out to visit him. In the mean time just working on
|building my circle with people currently in my city
|u/Rex_felis - 1 month
|
|Honestly I used to wonder why I was difficult for me to really click
|with people for a long time. Then I noticed I had a easier time
|getting girls than I did finding bros.  It finally dawned on me
|that a lot of the things I do to maintain my romantic relationships
|are exactly whats needed in my platonic ones.  To put it simply,
|break bread, go on walks, ask deeper questions. We're human, and
|honestly just grabbing a bite to eat with someone occasionally is one
|of the most grounding things you can do. 
|u/BadFont777 - 1 month
|
|Yo, my best friends growing up, mostly guys, are all long distance
|now. All my friends are women where I live and it is because they
|fucking do this. Didn't realize how much having built in things
|like school and sports did for me in my teens, then bars and
|partying in my 20s. Now it's tough to find a dude that just wants
|to chill and shoot the shit.
|u/Lazy_ML - 1 month
|
|This is something I have realized as well and it sucks for dudes.
|I’m married to an introvert who doesn’t like or need to be around
|people much and we live far away from where I grew up. It’s much
|easier for me to befriend women because of this but it causes
|tension in my marriage so I end up needing to chill out on the
|friendship and again I end up with no close friends.
|u/hahayeahimfinehaha - 1 month
|
|I don't mean this in an offensive way at all, and good for you for
|figuring this out, but I am genuinely so confused when I hear men
|say this. I thought all of those things -- deep talks, regular
|meals together, etc. -- was just ... an expected part of
|friendship, no? What did you do together with your platonic friends
|if not that?
|u/LemonySnicketTeeth - 1 month
|
|Asking the deeper questions I think is the key thing here. I've
|have people I've been friends with for a few years now, and I am
|realizing I never ask them much. And I see them on a weekly basis.
|They know a lot about me, cuz I tend to dominate conversations. I
|have to force myself to shut up and ask questions.
|u/vegapunkspicyy - 1 month
|
|real ive ruined a lot of platonic friends by being an asshat or just
|not accepting they don’t like me that way.
|u/OSP_amorphous - 1 month
|
|Mid thirties and I fucked up probably the best adult friendship
|I've had by drinking too much, fuck my life. I wasn't even being
|serious.
|u/vegapunkspicyy - 1 month
|
|you’ll get it back!! i know making friends when you get older is
|hard but you have more stories to tell and a new audience too.
|u/OSP_amorphous - 1 month
|
|Thanks for the kind words, they really mean a lot. I'll
|remember this!
|u/K4R1MM - 1 month
|
|Me too pal. I learned every time you meet someone new you get a
|chance to recreate who you are. You get to choose what they see!
|u/vegapunkspicyy - 1 month
|
|the mistakes you make also become part of your lore and helps
|create an understanding of what made you how you are
|u/84th_legislature - 1 month
|
|you'd be surprised what you can get back with a sincere apology
|and changed behavior. I've circled back on people years later and
|sometimes it was them sometimes it was me but with water under
|the bridge we were ready to try again
|u/CampusTour - 1 month
|
|Yeah, I noticed that as men age, we get a *lot* less tolerant of
|asshats and scumbags in our groups as we get older, mature, and
|especially have families. The guys that can't grow up get left
|behind (not invited to your friend's family BBQ because you always
|get too drunk), and the ones that are actual assholes get
|ostracized (fucking up somebody's job, banging somebody's wife,
|etc). It's not like college where somebody can cross the line and
|make good with a sincere apology and a six pack. At a certain age,
|people have something to lose, and just aren't gonna tolerate
|somebody who would fuck it up.
|u/Frumpy_little_noodle - 1 month
|
|Shit, I'm just coming into this one in a more positive mindset: I
|don't have to be interested in every woman who shows me positive
|attention. Makes it so much easier finally being able to take that
|pressure and anxiety off myself.
|u/lightaugust - 1 month
|
|Great one. I am still tight with my friends from High School and we
|get together once per year, and we are 35 years past high school.
|Seen each other through health troubles, tragedies and divorces.
|Outside of my kids they are the most important relationships I have.
|But it's work. You gotta call em and just say hey once in a while.
|But totally worth it.
|u/LittleMrsSwearsALot - 1 month
|
|Yes! And be good to your guy friends. Forge real friendships,
|relationships ships with your bros that involve real conversations,
|vulnerability as well as fun experiences. Too many me of my
|generation (GenX) don’t have *friends*, they have buddies, and we’re
|losing too many young men to suicide. Hang on to your friends and
|check on your boys.
|u/sciguy52 - 1 month
|
|Yeah I am 60 now. Making friends in my 40's was easy compared to
|this. I need to find some other geezers to hang with.
|u/hell_adjacent_665 - 1 month
|
|Fix your diet before it's too late, so many younger guys can't cook a
|healthy meal
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Yep. Health is 90% diet and 10% exercise (but you need to do both)
|You can’t outrun a crappy diet.
|u/MyFifthLimb - 1 month
|
|You almost can, but it is an exponentially greater amount of effort
|lol We are extremely fuel efficient, you can run a mile or you can
|simply not eat 2 Oreos for about the same calorie deficit. Calorie
|deficit is your best friend for weight loss, but ya you need more
|than just cutting calories to get healthy, you need actual healthy
|food.
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Millions of years of evolution so our species could survive lean
|times has its disadvantages
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|My binging instinct is particularly strong
|u/YodasGrundle - 1 month
|
|I'm more of a graze eater so the binge is enternal
|u/bearpie1214 - 1 month
|
|Never thought of it that way. 
|u/Consistent_Bread_287 - 1 month
|
|It does not work that way, calories are not the only issue.
|Things like cholesterol, chemicals in perceived foods, sodum,
|the longterm effect of drinking roo much alcohol. None of thise
|can be ran off at any distance. In fact they will decrease your
|ability to run long distances
|u/blueg3 - 1 month
|
|A mile isn't that much running. But I do appreciate this more
|nuanced take. You absolutely can outrun a bad diet (in terms of
|pure calories and weight), but you're probably not going to, so
|really don't take that as your strategy.
|u/IR8Things - 1 month
|
|That's for weight loss. Actual health is about having a healthy
|weight AND good cardio with resistance training. It's at least
|50/50 if you're not trying to lose the weight.
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Yes - it seems like cardio gets short shrift in much of the
|popular health and fitness literature. They seem to focus on
|istrength training and some quick sprint exercises. I can only
|speak for myself but I do 45 min of sweaty bike or swim and then
|30 min strength.
|u/kdubstep - 1 month
|
|I no do 45-60 a day of hard cycling on a trainer, 30-60 most
|days rowing (varying workouts), push-ups every day and kettle
|bells a few times a week. I’ll be 60 in a couple of weeks
|and I’m in as good of shape as I’ve ever been. Use it or
|lose it boys!
|u/Anzai - 1 month
|
|Cardio is very important. I’m a bicycle postman so I’m on a bike
|for four or five hours a day. I’m not much to look at, slightly
|overweight, no muscle tone… But I’ve been hiking in Nepal and
|New Zealand on two week treks, often back to back so we are doing
|high altitude hiking for up to four weeks at a time, and I can do
|that forever. The people I’ve gone with who are far more visibly
|‘fit’ than I am in terms of musculature really struggled and
|needed long breaks in places where I barely broke a sweat. It’s
|incredibly useful to have good cardio, even if it’s not
|necessarily going to make you look sexier or whatever.
|u/VofGold - 1 month
|
|You can however use extra calories in better ways. Muscle gain is
|awesome, and calories are just a variable in the body composition
|problem. It’s rarely worth it for me to go into all the nerdy
|details on this topic so I won’t really…, but people looking at
|exercise as just a way to burn calories are missing the point.
|Far more importantly it drives adaptations, whether that be general
|health or body composition adaptations, or neural and cns
|(proprioception/skill at moving, strength and athleticism). Food
|and diet has its own intricacies, but you likely know the answers
|there, even if most don’t know why or use false equivalencies.
|Mini rant over :P.
|u/LaylaKnowsBest - 1 month
|
|This! One of the sexiest things about my husband is that I can be
|craving pretty much any meal or dish and he makes it *perfectly*
|every single time. We were just roommates whenever we first met, the
|first day he moved in he cooked us a nice meal. I asked if he thought
|his first day living there was such a special occassion that he had
|to cook a nice meal. He was like "I'm just making some dinner for us,
|nothing special!" like what I considered to be meals for a special
|occasion was just regular dinner for him. and I was just like.. what
|the fuck? There are guys out there, who aren't chefs, that can do
|this so well??? Guys, learn to cook, guaranteed panty dropped for
|some girls out there in the right context! Especially if it's like
|the second or third date where she invites you back to her place for
|dinner/movie/drinks. And then instead of ordering food you decide to
|cook a bad ass meal for her??? You'll definitely come out ahead that
|night!
|u/Reptilesblade - 1 month
|
|Early on I always tell a woman that I'm dating or trying to date
|the same line and it pretty much always goes over well. If it
|doesn't then that definitely tells me that we're not compatible
|early on and I know not to waste my time. "A woman's place is in
|the kitchen *with me.*" I love to cook and do so several times a
|week at the very least. A woman who doesn't want to join me in the
|kitchen for us both to make a meal for each of us to share tells me
|a lot about her and why we shouldn't be together. Because if she's
|not willing to make a meal for both of us and expects me to pay all
|the time and every time to go out to eat then at best those are
|strong gold digger vibes and she's only with me for what I can do
|for her instead of who I actually am. And it doesn't matter if
|she doesn't know how to cook. If she's wanting to learn that's a
|green flag. I absolutely love teaching people and helping them grow
|to live better lives. Just like my last girlfriend of 4.5 years who
|had no idea how to cook at 28 years old whenever we first got
|together. I taught her and now she cooks most of her meals and is
|actually quite good at it. It's literally something that we can
|bond over as a couple. Jesus Christ half of the girlfriends I've
|had in my life became my girlfriend's because they found out that I
|could cook.
|u/LaylaKnowsBest - 1 month
|
|> A woman who doesn't want to join me in the kitchen for us both
|to make a meal for each of us to share tells me a lot about her
|and why we shouldn't be together. In the past I would have
|definitely scoffed or rolled my eyes at this comment. However,
|after being with my husband and thinking of how many amazing
|memories we've made just from something as simple as cooking a
|meal together, I totally understand the sentiment here! > And it
|doesn't matter if she doesn't know how to cook. If she's wanting
|to learn that's a green flag. Ladies (and guys!) please keep
|this in mind! I was so embarrassed early on because my cooking
|skills stopped at "bring the water to a boil" but my husband was
|SO HAPPY because he was so excited that he had all of these
|amazing things he could teach me. Again, we have had so many
|wonderful memories in the kitchen. Regardless of how busy our
|weeks get, we make it a point to cook at least one meal together
|every weekend. We'll take some edibles, turn some music on, and
|just have fun together!
|u/Valuable_Panda_4228 - 1 month
|
|“Bring the water to a boil” What am I a chemist?
|u/Scarecrow116 - 1 month
|
|50/50. Full stomach = no sexy time
|u/LaylaKnowsBest - 1 month
|
|Nope, that's all part of the grand plan! Full stomach = "Let's
|put on a movie while our food settles" = get all close and
|snuggly during the movie = obviously leads to more!
|u/Thin_Kaleidoscope_21 - 1 month
|
|hey, I wanted to ask do you remember what he cooked fr the first
|meal?
|u/LaylaKnowsBest - 1 month
|
|He's from South Louisiana and I'm pretty sure it was one of the
|dishes from that region. It was either Crawfish Etouffee or
|Chicken Sauce Piquant. But it didn't even need to be fancy. A
|few nights later he might've made something super simple..
|chicken breast, baked potato, veggies... but he tries so hard
|that even simple meals always taste like they're from a
|restaurant. I wanted to reciprocate and cook dinner one night
|so I got a pack of pasta, a can of spaghetti sauce, and some
|ground beef. Just super simple spaghetti. He asked if he could
|come join me in the kitchen. He added 4 or 5 things to the canned
|sauce, asked if we could let it simmer for 20 mins, and then when
|it was dinnertime that normal ass spaghetti tasted so god damn
|good. Over the years he's taught me about as much as he can
|about cooking. And it seems like once you learn the basics, and
|have actually taken the time to practice and experiment, that you
|can pretty much turn any recipe into something you would REALLY
|enjoy eating. He's never had any formal training, nobody in his
|family had any training. They're just from a part of the country
|where cooking is really important socially.
|u/TC132465 - 1 month
|
|Can confirm cooking = getting laid. Also guitar
|u/hatsnatcher23 - 1 month
|
|>we were just roommates whenever we first met *oh my god they were
|roommates*
|u/mercut1o - 1 month
|
|Everyone should learn to cook in general. I mean make a full meal of
|some sort of chopped and prepared vegetable, a cooked protein, and a
|some other thing, not just make rice and prepackaged chicken for
|survival. I genuinely believe nothing is better for you, better
|financially, more attractive to a partner, and more grounding in the
|world around you than knowing the price of your ingredients and
|making a full meal. There are so many more people in life you can
|connect to over making food than if you are someone who expects the
|world to take care of that for you, or if you're someone who only
|eats frozen pizza. Learning family recipes and passing them down,
|appreciating the things on a menu you wouldn't even know how to start
|cooking, seasoning food specifically to your personal taste...the
|list goes on and on.
|u/Crackheadwithabrain - 1 month
|
|Or cook in general. This isn't a jab. Too many women nowadays are
|waiting for a traditional man and men are waiting on a traditional
|women but neither are trying to be independent.
|u/HuntedWolf - 1 month
|
|Learning to cook became my lockdown hobby. Before that I could do
|very simple uncreative meals that usually involved just putting stuff
|in a pan or oven. I got a bunch of recipe books and used a meal
|delivery site for a few months to get some basics down. Now I love
|being able to open my fridge and find flavours to blend or pan fry a
|nice piece of fish correctly.
|u/robbzilla - 1 month
|
|I'm 54 and just lost one of my lifelong best friends to kidney
|failure linked to diabetes. He lived off of McDonalds and Chick Fil
|A. He was also 3 months and a day younger than me, though you
|wouldn't have known it the last few years when we stood next to each
|other.
|u/Superpe0n - 1 month
|
|You can push your body to the limit in your 20s (exercise, power
|lifting, etc) and recover easily. If you arent careful, your 30s are a
|wake up call, strains and injuries become permanent.
|u/theunlikelycabbage - 1 month
|
|They also take a lot longer to heal after 30. I get sports injuries
|from time to time and I swear the recovery period is now months not
|weeks
|u/layze23 - 1 month
|
|I have a surgery or PT every 2-3 years from sports. Meniscus,
|broken finger, back issues, torn Achilles... I had my last one
|about a year ago so at least I have another 1-2 years before my
|next serious injury 🙄
|u/terriblegrammar - 1 month
|
|Preventative PT has become part of my weekly routine to keep all
|those small muscles in the legs, glutes, hips strong and supporting
|the ligaments. Strains take forever to heal so doing all I can to
|prevent them has made a big difference in my ability to
|hike/run/ski hard in my mid 30s.
|u/Specific_Club_8622 - 1 month
|
|Ruptured ligament on my finger trying to parkour at 40 lol. 9
|months later still can’t fully bend my finger all the way!
|u/spiteful_god1 - 1 month
|
|Recent studies indicate that metabolism doesn't change much between
|25 and 60. What does change is recovery time. So if you get an
|injury in your mid 40s, it'll take longer to heal than in your 20s,
|which means more time with excess calorie consumption that your
|body has to deal with. A significant amount of weight gain it is
|speculated comes from this. Get injured, gain weight which makes
|you more susceptible to injuries, repeat. The good news is that if
|your careful and conscious about fully recovering after injuries as
|well as not over eating while healing, the science says you should
|be able to keep a fit build. The bad news is that a single injury
|can lead to a self reinforcing cycle that makes it progressively
|more difficult to maintain a healthy weight.
|u/seanbluestone - 1 month
|
|Mobility is the big one. Most people barely think of stretching and
|full range of motion as necessary and useful but if you don't want to
|end up a big block of tight knotted up muscle 10 years from now
|you'll start spending conscious time and effort on stretching a
|couple times a week and ideally never skimp on range of motion unless
|you have a damn good reason.
|u/imbuzzedatm - 1 month
|
|This! I spent my 20s lifting heavy and getting into shape, now in
|my 30s doing mostly stretching and mobility exercises. Use to get
|severe back pain each month prior to discovering hip flexor
|stretches.
|u/yoddbo - 1 month
|
|You mind sharing those hip flexor stretches?
|u/ylerta - 1 month
|
|https://youtu.be/FSSDLDhbacc This includes a great hip flexor
|stretch, among other things
|u/FrankBeamer_ - 1 month
|
|This is a great routine
|u/MeGoingTOWin - 1 month
|
|1) Get the Down Dog App 2) Select Yin Yoga 3) Start at 15m
|beginner and work up to 30m beginner, then you can increase to 20m
|intermediate, and keep going Do this 2x a week minimum. In 6
|weeks you will not beleive how good you feel. I just started
|adding this to my 4x a week lifting 4m ago and within 2 weeks i was
|more flexible than ever - able to get my fingers wrapped around the
|bottoms of my feet! And om 51! Get after it!
|u/Weird_Assignment649 - 1 month
|
|Also, by keeping fit throughout your 20s and 30s you're a lot less
|likely to get injured at 40. Right now I'm 40 and fitter, stronger
|than I've ever been.
|u/Necrotitis - 1 month
|
|Literally. 38 here, tore my rotator cuff tightning a screw under the
|sink, probably need surgery now. 5 days later I was running up my
|stairs and missed a step, normally would be a whoops, but I broke my
|foot. Today I woke up funny and it feels like someone is stabbing a
|flaming hot needle in between my neck and back. My advice to younger
|people. Don't work too hard, all that effort can be taken away from
|you in an instant (lost my previous career due to severe mental
|health issues). Burned out in my 20s saving lives, only to no longer
|enjoy my own. Most companies and careers don't give a fuck about you
|so don't destroy your body to make some rich assholes richer.
|u/MeGoingTOWin - 1 month
|
|Damn, you need, as do most others, to workout. Im 51 and lift 4x a
|week, do yoga 2x a week, walk the dogs for 30+m 3+ times a week -
|and this is all at a minimum. And i never get injured. I may get
|a littel pain or niggle here or there due to overworking or
|overstretching but these soon go away. Get after it!
|u/pylesofwood - 1 month
|
|Yep. Take good care of the lower back. Use good technique when
|lifting stuff.
|u/jrd5497 - 1 month
|
|Use good technique, but don’t be afraid to USE your back. People
|are most often hurt because their spinal erectors are weak. Use
|them fuckers. Don’t be a glass back.
|u/CocktailChemist - 1 month
|
|Doesn’t matter where you’re starting from, apply progressive
|overload at a sustainable pace and it will get stronger.
|u/xZPFxBarteq - 1 month
|
|One of things that's not a huge incovenience but mildly annoys me is
|how any type of skin injury heals so damn long now. I popped an
|annoying pimple on my chin, it's been months and I still see a faint
|mark after it.
|u/PayasoCanuto - 1 month
|
|In my 20s I could party Thursday, Friday, Saturday and then on Sunday
|wake up at 8 am to play football all morning. Now I drink a beer
|and I am useless for 3 days lol
|u/AmigoDelDiabla - 1 month
|
|However, being in good shape goes a long way in preventing strains
|and injuries. Don't push yourself, but also don't give up physical
|activity.
|u/Rick_from_C137 - 1 month
|
|Truth. In my forties now, and job number one in the gym is don't get
|injured.
|u/Nearby-Necessary3681 - 1 month
|
|Keep the weight off, look after your teeth. Stay clear of debt - most
|importantly have fun / make every day count - before you know it your
|20’s will be all but a distant memory.
|u/InsaneComicBooker - 1 month
|
|I took a credit in my twenties to boost my brother's bussiness
|endeavor. He was hoping to pay me back within a year. He's now
|working as a doors to doors salesman and struggles to send me back
|money on time to cover what I lose on monthly payments. I will be
|paying off that debt. for the rest of my fucking life.
|u/boxsterguy - 1 month
|
|That's another good piece of advice: "Don't buy into your
|family/friends 'investment' schemes." And the corollary, don't
|ever cosign a loan for anybody. If they're having trouble getting
|a loan for whatever it is (business idea, car, house, etc), there's
|a *reason* banks aren't lending to them. You're not smarter than
|the banks. If you want to help out, give money freely from what
|you have (don't take a loan to give). If they pay you back, bonus.
|But assume that money's gone forever.
|u/Hour_Insurance_7795 - 1 month
|
|*"Never mix friends/family and money. You'll end up losing
|both."*
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Yep. That happened in my family and with some of my in laws
|u/wut3va - 1 month
|
|I've been part of a family business since 1995. Sometimes it
|works out, but we are the exception, not the rule.
|u/metabeliever - 1 month
|
|Don't loan the people in your life money. You can give it to
|them. They might even give it back. Don't loan it to them.
|u/SnooFoxes6180 - 1 month
|
|Another: If you want to lose a friend, lend him money
|u/weeklygamingrecap - 1 month
|
|Yeah, treat it like money you'll never see again, never ask
|for, never bring up. If you can't, say you can't help.
|u/Weak_Rate_3552 - 1 month
|
|Lending money and gambling have the same philosophy for me.
|Don't do it, and if you do consider it money spent.
|u/az_babyy - 1 month
|
|Had an old friend years ago that fell onto some unfortunate
|family circumstances and needed a new car to get to and from work
|asap. She was $800 short for some old junker and asked if I'd be
|willing to help and promised to give the money back within the
|next few months. I had the money and figured I'd hope someone
|would help me if I got put in that situation with little warning.
|It was about 3 years before I saw it again. I watched her take
|random trips, buy expensive items for herself, etc. I never once
|asked about the money. When I gave it to her, even though I hoped
|to get it it back, I never expected to. She finally sent it one
|day and apologized for how long it took. Within the week she
|asked for $300 back and promised to pay me back her next
|paycheck. I sent the $300 and about 3 or 4 years later I still
|haven't heard anything about getting it back.
|u/DiabeticButNotFat - 1 month
|
|I learned a long time ago that a loaning money to friends or family
|is never a loan. It’s a gift, or should be treated as such from the
|lender. Never expect the money back. You’ll just ruin the
|relationship.
|u/MohawkElGato - 1 month
|
|Are you unable to file for bankruptcy? It helped my life a ton
|after years of drowning in debt and never being able to save
|u/astromech_dj - 1 month
|
|To add, find a sport you enjoy and stick with it. Not only does it
|help keep the momentum on your fitness, it opens up an avenue for
|social interaction.
|u/toru_okada_4ever - 1 month
|
|Yep to the first one. Based on myself: If you are reasonably fit in
|your 20’s, getting back in shape when you are 30 is fairly easy. When
|you’re 40 it is much harder, and when you are 50 it is pretty darn
|impossible.
|u/Sunuva_Gun - 1 month
|
|Agree and the overall lesson is that it's easier to maintain a
|little bit, every day than catch up over months. The months turn
|in to years.. That's exercise for sure but also money and
|relationships.
|u/evilJaze - 1 month
|
|51 here and former strength trainer and bodybuilder in my early
|20s. I let myself go in my 30s due to my sit-down job and it's been
|so, so, _so_ hard to get it back. Started 4 years ago and still
|going but it's painfully slow progress. Weight around the
|midsection is tenacious and angry!
|u/Clunk500CM - 1 month
|
|58\[M\] here: The muscle loss when you get to 55 is shocking. I
|would spend more time at the gym if I wasn't spending so much time
|taking a piss every hour. Guys: make fitness a lifestyle.
|u/bambagico - 1 month
|
|While this is all true for some people like myself the thirties are
|actually better than the twenties so it's not so dramatic like you
|picture in certain cases
|u/ashoka_akira - 1 month
|
|I am way better looking in my 40s, its half confidence and half
|learning how to look after my health/weight
|u/dishwab - 1 month
|
|This is good. You can save for retirement all you want but you never
|know when you’re gonna go. Enjoy life while you can.
|u/DonkeyBootyClap - 1 month
|
|My 20s end on Sunday, and I’ve spent the last year trying to get all
|of these under control. I’m having more fun than I used to, and also
|taking better care of myself. Excited for the 30s tbh
|u/Bloorajah - 1 month
|
|Everyone is giving decent advice, but as someone whose 20s were lost in
|a spiral of drugs, debt, self hatred, job failures, and just generally
|being shit-kicked at every turn by being alive right now: Don’t worry
|if you aren’t doing everything perfectly right. Very *very* few people
|actually have the means and opportunity to succeed that early, or to
|even address most of the advice in this thread at any point in their
|lives. Avoiding debt entirely is a privilege afforded to few, chances
|are you will almost never have what feels like “enough money” the
|system is built that way, and it’s not your fault. don’t beat yourself
|up for figuring it out as you go. life can, and absolutely will,
|throw curveballs that you cannot handle. Agonizing over whether you’re
|“doing it right” will seem really really insignificant when you get
|diagnosed with cancer and face medical bankruptcy while fighting for
|your life, or mom dies of a stroke before you can say goodbye. also,
|comparison is the thief of joy, and ignorance is bliss.
|u/Werner_Herzogs_Dream - 1 month
|
|I will say from personal experience that doing everything "right" in
|your 20s can still make you miserable. I did all the things that was
|expected of me and I felt awful.
|u/Objective-Gap-2433 - 1 month
|
| Amen, I fought hard during my 20's. Depression, drugs, alcohol but a
|lot fun times too
|u/d3v0ur355 - 1 month
|
|Real stuff. Thank you for this, bro.
|u/Important_Lab_58 - 1 month
|
|Honestly, I was getting a little overwhelmed reading all these and
|Your Comment helped a LOT, Dude. Seriously-Thank You and I hope
|You’re Well
|u/ZeinV2 - 1 month
|
|For any young people reading, I can't agree with this more. My 20s
|were spent being mostly homeless becuase I had no one there and every
|day was a struggle. I worked 2 and sometimes 3 jobs just to make ends
|meet. When I was 29 I finally had the chance to go back to school and
|figure things out. Now at 34, I make over 6 figures and love my life.
|Not everyone has the best opportunities when you're young and don't
|beat yourself up if mistakes happen.
|u/Chanclet0 - 1 month
|
|Damn this is golden, thanks man
|u/reptrept - 1 month
|
|this is the best comment in the thread
|u/shitloadofshit - 1 month
|
|I just want to say (regarding debt specifically). I used to feel this
|way as well. It turned out that my parents had not given me even a
|cursory level of education in personal finance. And it is generally
|culturally accepted that debt is a part of life (a mortgage is
|basically inevitable, of course) so my advice being in my thirties is
|LEARN ABOUT PERSONAL FINANCE FROM TRUSTED SOURCES. Don’t listen to
|these people talking about arbitrage and “other people’s money”
|that’s basically gambling. I could not recommend Ramit Sethi’s book
|“I will teach you to be rich” enough. It’s a purposefully
|inflammatory cover to a book that is filled with hard math and a
|common sense approach to PF that can keep you out of debt and make
|sure you don’t have to work until the day you die. Start a ROTH IRA
|in your early twenty’s, set it. Forget it. You’re welcome.
|u/zoey8068 - 1 month
|
|YES!!!!! We had a somewhat similar experience, I basically threw away
|my twenties. I would add two things 1. Don't let fear control you
|if anything if it scares you, do it. (Within reason) 2. Stop
|worrying what others think! Not being cool or "in fashion" is okay. I
|spent so much of my time trying to be what I thought others wanted
|and I just wasn't that type of person. It's way more cool to be
|genuine to who you are even if that doesn't feel cool at the time.
|u/Bocote - 1 month
|
|This is probably life-saving advice for a few people out there.
|u/irishgollum - 1 month
|
|If you are still on friendly terms with people from school or uni make
|a conscious effort to maintain those relationships. I'm in my mid 40s
|and through no deliberate thought I am out of contact with everyone
|from school/uni. Life gets in the way and suddenly you haven't seen
|your best friend from school in 20 years.
|u/kosmitka777 - 1 month
|
|This can hit you also hard if you are focused on your relationship
|and think that you will always have at least one person to spend time
|with, so you ignore investing time in activities involving other
|people. At some point you can become single and very lonely.
|u/WrongCorgi - 1 month
|
|Every good friend I made at every step of school kinda faded away,
|since everyone scattered all over the country/world after graduating
|highschool, college, grad school etc.. When you have to focus on your
|own situation, the distance can really erode those relationships.
|u/non-hyphenated_ - 1 month
|
|Wear sunscreen
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|I will never understand a dude's aversion to sunscreen. It's like
|they think it will make them gay if they use it. Just wear the
|sunscreen. Like *every day*. on your face, at least.
|u/Dapper_Work_6078 - 1 month
|
|Face 100% to reduce signs of aging but body no way. Way too gay.
|Just kidding. Although that said most people in the West are
|vitamin D deficient. We evolved to be outside with our skin exposed
|all day. It’s important to remember that
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Well vitamin d doesn’t really work the way people think it does,
|you can get a lot of vitamin d exposure but still be deficient.
|If you don’t eat a good overall diet then you won’t actually
|retain it That said, you can still synthesize vitamin d while
|wearing sunscreen. We have evolved to handle the sun to a
|certain degree, but we also didn’t used to live very long. Being
|out in the sun all day for 30-40 years is very different from
|being in the sun all day for 50, 60+ years. That’s part of why
|skin cancer is such a concern
|u/Dapper_Work_6078 - 1 month
|
|I don’t think your logic follows for the last sentence. A 30
|year old pre-modern man would have way more sun exposure in
|total vs a 60 year old modern man. As a society we’re massively
|under-sunned yet still have increasing rates of skin cancer.
|Much likely a third variable, metabolic health, vitamin d
|deficiency (which regulates the immune system and helps fight
|cancers including melanoma), or something else is the cause.
|Not too much sun
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Yeah but it’s not always about consistently being in the sun,
|it’s more like how sun exposure can impact you later on. Sun
|damage is cumulative, you can’t go back on it, and a few
|nasty burns in your early years can place you at a much
|higher chance of skin cancer in your later years. Or sitting
|in tanning beds, laying in the sun when you’re young, even if
|you stop doing it, those things place you at risk later in
|life. You have cases of skin cancer that are connected to
|childhood burns But back in the day, we didn’t live long
|enough to see those consequences Skin cancer is quite
|common in elderly folk, for that reason
|u/Astralwinks - 1 month
|
|My wife has a family history of skin cancer, she's had some moles
|removed, and is diligent about wearing sunscreen. She's also
|like... Really sensitive to the tactile sensation/experience of
|sunscreen. She *hates* it. But I know most of her makeup has spf
|and she has spent a lot of time and effort finding fancy sunscreens
|that are less offensive to her (an my god, some of them are
|AMAZING, albeit quite expensive, they feel like liquid velvet going
|on). Unfortunately, this sunscreen aversion extends to me. I
|should take better care of my skin since I sunburned the shit out
|of it multiple times growing up. Ever since I got tattooed (and now
|I am pretty well covered) I got better about at least protecting my
|artwork. But that means she hates touching my skin at all if I've
|put on sunscreen until I've showered. Like literally pulls away
|from me if we touch. And on occasion even after I've showered she
|has said I haven't scrubbed it all off and that my skin still feels
|weird. On our last vacation she asked why I hadn't put any on that
|day, I told her I didn't want her to not touch me. I'll wear any
|sunscreen, it doesn't bother me like it does her. And since I am
|very tall (lots of surface area that needs coverage) using the
|expensive fancy stuff isn't really viable since it comes in small
|amounts and I want her to have the stuff she prefers. I've found
|one that is much lighter and still has great spf that she'll
|tolerate for more of a full body coverage - but it sucks knowing
|that once it goes on she will barely touch me until I've showered
|at the end of the day. I get showering off everything before
|getting into bed especially since it's probably been hot and sweaty
|and one gets a little grimey. But I'm discovering that I'd rather
|get burned if it means she'll rest her leg against mine, stroke my
|arm, or touch the back of my neck. Spf clothing is good, but it
|blocks the skin to skin contact I want.
|u/TheSquishedElf - 1 month
|
|90% of sunscreens feel awful though. Dry-touch are the only
|sunscreens that don’t make me want to gag just applying it, crappy
|sunscreen is like rubbing snot into your arm. That never dries,
|either.
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Yeah. I hear that. It’s hard to find one that works well and
|isn’t greasy. They do make good ones but they can be hard to
|find They tend to do a better job of making face sunscreens with
|different textures, but not so much with body sunscreens. That
|said. It’s better to use other sun protective measures anyway
|u/DanNZN - 1 month
|
|In my day that pretty much applied to any PPE. They called gloves
|"hand panties" but would also smirk and hearing protection, safety
|googles, sunscreen, etc. It's like we values suffering and constant
|risk of injury. Dumb masculine thing.
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Yep and it’s so interesting you say that because my father is
|having work done on his house, it’s a whole renovation project.
|The workers don’t want to wear PPE because they are “old
|fashioned” and they like to sing while they work (apparently).
|Which is crazy to me - one of the biggest workplace disasters had
|to take place in order for us to have things like OSHA, and other
|things to protect us from things like inhaling sawdust and
|silica. And these guys just don’t care because they like to sing
|while working
|u/CallMeJeeJ - 1 month
|
|Every time someone tries to pick on me for lathering up I just drop
|this line on them: “What, you think you’re tougher than *the
|sun?!*” It’s happened several times and often the person giving me
|a hard time is immediately ridiculed by everyone else around them.
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Recently I was at Universal with some relatives, and I was the
|sunscreen police. Apply, reapply, reapply. We had a UV index of
|11, we are reapplying the SPF 50 and I dont want to hear it And
|people were still bitching about wearing a hat or wearing
|sunscreen By the way, I’m the only one who didn’t get a
|sunburn, and I burn quite easily.
|u/LiveShowOneNightOnly - 1 month
|
|I avoided this for decades because I hated the feeling of sunscreen
|on my palms after I applied it. Now I have learned to plan ahead and
|combine sunscreen with a place to wash my hands. It's not that hard.
|I just associate restroom breaks with applying sunscreen so that I am
|near a sink for washing up afterwards.
|u/blister12 - 1 month
|
|Everybody’s free to…
|u/GlenF - 1 month
|
|Needs to be upvoted more. It’s bad enough having chunks of your face
|carved out, but the donor spots for the skin graft to “replace the
|divot” are an unwelcome bonus penalty.
|u/Stumon_3 - 1 month
|
|Baz Luhrmann had his reasons 
|u/Special-Bite - 1 month
|
|Ah the ol’ class of 99
|u/warrends - 1 month
|
|Retirement money. Start saving now!!!
|u/earth_resident_yep - 1 month
|
|I agree with this one sooo much. I started at the end of my twenties
|and now wish I would have started in my mid twenties. Early twenties
|wasn't an option (college).
|u/jcooli09 - 1 month
|
|I disregarded this advice in my 20s. Now I’m 60 and will have to
|work another 7 years.
|u/jessewalker2 - 1 month
|
|I feel you. I’m late 40s and I’ll die before I get a chance to
|retire.
|u/Curmudgeonistical - 1 month
|
|Never to late to start saving, you've still got time to get
|something in the bank. Didn't have a decent paying job till I
|was 43. Took advantage of 401k and employer match. Big thing
|was live within my means and get rid of debt. Retired at 62.
|Not rich, but very comfortable, just be content with what you
|can afford.
|u/soberdude - 1 month
|
|I'm 45, and I'm trying to save for my retirement. But I think
|that dying will probably be my retirement plan.
|u/Outrageous-Sink-688 - 1 month
|
|The power of compounding. I started late and made up ground, but I
|majored in economics and worked as an accountant. Most people don't
|have that level of expertise, so if you don't, start early and invest
|in the S&P index fund.
|u/choogawooga - 1 month
|
|Vti and chill
|u/TheMrGNasty - 1 month
|
|I can not stress this enough. The difference between putting $100/mo
|into a dividend ETF inside a Roth IRA at 18 vs starting at 30 is
|insane. Starting at 18 you'll contribute $14,400 more, but the end
|value at 65 will be worth around $400,000 more than if you start at
|30
|u/choogawooga - 1 month
|
|Is there a way to set your kids up with this kind of compounding
|even earlier? Say, age 10 or so?
|u/bsimms89 - 1 month
|
|You can open a 529 plan for you kids when they are born to invest
|for college, its growth is tax deferred and most states it’s tax
|Free when you withdraw and use it for college expenses, and in a
|lot of states you get a write off for contributing up to a
|certain amount. The other option is to open a custodial account
|for your child, it’s a standard investment account that you
|control for them until they turn 18 at which point they assume
|control of the account. You can gift them up the the maximum
|annual gift allowed without them having to pay income tax on it
|(I believe it’s currently 18k for an individual or 36k for a
|married couple that they can gift) My wife and I are
|contributing as much as we can to our kids accounts now when
|they’re under 2, by the time they’re 3 we shouldn’t have to
|contribute anymore and if the market averages at least 8% until
|they’re 18 (historically it averages 10%) our kids should be able
|to afford any college they want.
|u/TheMrGNasty - 1 month
|
|Like the other person said you can create a 529 account for them,
|or also you can create a custodial Roth IRA for them. They can
|use it for retirement, use it for college, take a loan out
|against it for the down payment for a house etc.
|u/LoseAnotherMill - 1 month
|
|The cool part about the 529 is that up to $35k can be rolled
|over into a Roth IRA after they graduate from college, so the
|529 is basically a Roth IRA that can access before they're
|retired for educational purposes. 
|u/affnn - 1 month
|
|The way I think about it is this: if you wanna retire at 60, then
|every dollar you save on your 50s will have a 1x multiplier - if you
|save a dollar in your 50s, you’ll have a dollar at retirement.
|Everything in your 40s will have a 2x multiplier. 30s, a 4x
|multiplier. 20s, an 8x multiplier. So if you save $1 in your 20s and
|put it into a boring target date fund through vanguard or whatever,
|it’ll be worth $8 when you’re 60 and want to retire. (Using
|historical gains as a reference, adjusted for inflation)
|u/armpitketchupandbutt - 1 month
|
|As my friend said, live like none of your friends in your 20s, so
|you can live like none of your friends in your 60s.
|u/sinovercoschessITF - 1 month
|
|Where exactly are we putting this dollar? In a 401k? Or IRA?
|u/Blarfk - 1 month
|
|401k up to the match from your employer (if there is one) and
|then the rest in an IRA.
|u/HughManatee - 1 month
|
|Don't forget HSA! Tax-free in and out!
|u/GandhiMSF - 1 month
|
|Please go to the r/personalfinance Prime Directive (it should be
|stickied on the side of the subreddit but you can also just
|google). It walks you through, in very basic terms, what you
|should be doing with money to invest in retirement (and other
|things like emergency fund and paying off loans). It is very
|basic and it’s something I wish I had read when I was in my early
|20s to get a general understanding of finances and get things at
|least a little bit in order. Also, if you have questions about
|what specifically to invest in (like index funds) I would
|strongly recommend r/bogleheads as a really simple and effective
|investment strategy.
|u/718cs - 1 month
|
|A vanguard target fund. He mentioned that in the comment
|u/CytronicsZA - 1 month
|
|You guys have money to save?
|u/UltraSapien - 1 month
|
|Pre-tax 401(k) money, assuming you're an American. You won't really
|feel a 7% pre-tax contribution too much, but your future self will
|LOVE you for it
|u/bossmcsauce - 1 month
|
|Got that 8% match plus 3% free contribution from employer. My
|base salary isn’t particularly high for my role, but the benefits
|package is legit.
|u/JohnD_s - 1 month
|
|Damn son, 8% is super nice.
|u/Marijuana_Miler - 1 month
|
|Whatever you’re making take 10% and save that money as soon as you
|get paid. If you can’t afford to save 10% without losing your house
|or not eating you need to reevaluate your lifestyle. Saving now
|will develop the habit of saving early in life and with how
|compound interest works it should be worth about 10-15x more by the
|time you retire. Let’s say at 20 you save $20 a week for a year you
|would expect to turn that into between $10,400-$15,600 by the time
|you’re 65. As you age your income increases and you can start
|saving more. Most people who become millionaires did it through
|saving early.
|u/FinancialAdvice4Me - 1 month
|
|Literally every 20 yo I know, even the broke ones, go out to bars
|multiple times per week. My kid was in college and the number of
|instagram posts "at the bar, Bobby just had a flaming drink and
|caught his beard on fire" sort of things was wild. Yeah, I get it,
|college is a fun time. But I know Bobby and he's borrowing money
|for rent. Go make spiked punch at a house party. It's like $2 per
|person.
|u/Couldnotbehelpd - 1 month
|
|I think it’s interesting because the realities of money are
|actually quite different than they were a decade ago even.
|Inflation has made saving so much harder than it used to be, and
|it’s not like salaries have made a similar jump.
|u/FinancialAdvice4Me - 1 month
|
|That's true. It's tricky, but I also see SO many people
|shooting themselves in the foot. A really pervasive attitude
|of "it's hard to so fuck trying at all". I can only speak to
|my 23yo. I don't fund his college or his lifestyle. The one
|advantage he has is he knows he won't become homeless because
|he always has a bedroom at home, but other than that, I think
|it's an important lesson to manage his own finances. I helped
|with his car insurance and cellphone when he was 19 in his
|second year (he had no car when he was 18 in his first year,
|but saved for one over those two summers). So there's that.
|After that year, he paid it all himself. So far he's kept
|college debt below $50k for a 5 year program and just got his
|masters degree in engineering. He doesn't know it, but I'll
|help with his debts a little, but overall he's funded his
|entire lifestyle with jobs during an accelerated university
|program. I get it's not easy, but doing smart things goes a
|long way. It's not like he did anything special, he worked at
|Best Buy for a long time and saved money over the summers from
|that job alone. He had some slightly better paying internships
|based on his engineering major, but so did most of his
|classmates. Yeah, you have to shop carefully and yeah he had 5
|roommates (but he lived in Boulder, CO, which is fairly HCOL)
|and he drove a 200k mile car and did his own maintenance
|work... I know it's different today, but that's the only
|reference I have in detail is my kid's finances. And it's
|totally possible.
|u/LionoftheNorth - 1 month
|
|If you can save $20 every month from the month you turn 20, and
|invest it into an index fund which on average grows 7% per
|year, that money will be worth $48k by the time you're 60. If
|you hold off until you're 70, it will be worth $98k.
|u/Pristine-Lunch-2503 - 1 month
|
|Good point.... I'm a female. I have no business here but I like
|the responses
|u/GoochyGoochyGoo - 1 month
|
|The advise here is valid for everyone.
|u/Rin-Tohsaka-is-hot - 1 month
|
|If you're single and making more than $30k/year, then so can you.
|For me personally, monthly rent is $1,250 (including utilities),
|food is $250, parking $100, gas $150, etc. Comes out to about
|$20k per year, so like $30k pre-tax. That's the bare necessities
|for me as a young single (no dependents I mean, not necessarily no
|partner) male with no healthcare expenses (women unfortunately will
|always have healthcare expenses even when perfectly healthy because
|biology is a burden in our privatized system). Anything above that
|$30k is expendable. For me personally, 60% of my income goes toward
|either savings or paying off student loan debt. I don't make a ton
|of money.
|u/spoonman-of-alcatraz - 1 month
|
|And when you do, look for an institution that’s a fiduciary, such as
|Fidelity, to invest your money. Many are not, such as UBS, and will
|happily do what’s in their best interest, not yours. Keep in mind
|that 401(k)s have annual fees, where an IRA does not. And if you’re
|going to participate in your own investing, invest in what you know.
|EDIT: John Oliver did a great segment on retirement plans that
|explains fiduciaries and retirement savings.
|u/catboy_supremacist - 1 month
|
|> Keep in mind that 401(k)s have annual fees, where an IRA does
|not. Obviously if your job does 401K matching though you need
|contribute at least enough to get the maximum match or else you are
|literally turning down free money.
|u/spoonman-of-alcatraz - 1 month
|
|Definitely this.
|u/Still_Want_Mo - 1 month
|
|My dad preached this to me early. I worked in highschool/college and
|he allowed me to put it all into a Roth IRA and helped me out with
|rent and food. Best dad ever. It's worth over $500k now and I'm not
|even 30
|u/BigTuna0890 - 1 month
|
|This! I’m 33 with already a 100K in retirement thanks to compound
|interest.
|u/yawn44yawn - 1 month
|
|Take chances. No better time to roll the dice then young and single.
|Try another city, switch jobs, travel ect.
|u/Disastrous-Net4003 - 1 month
|
|I would rather say Oh well than what if
|u/Mr_Cleanish - 1 month
|
|That was always my motto. I have 3 STIs.
|u/SDIR - 1 month
|
|3 Subarus? I like it, what gen are they?
|u/TedW - 1 month
|
|My brother, they ain't pringles.
|u/DeathByBamboo - 1 month
|
|Nor are they Pokémon
|u/mp3006 - 1 month
|
|Username checks out
|u/Kindly_Opinion6418 - 1 month
|
|How are they treating ya? I’ve heard Subaru engine bays are
|notoriously shit to work on r/s
|u/ABahRunt - 1 month
|
|Subaru's are sick
|u/Disastrous-Net4003 - 1 month
|
|lol
|u/SolidLikeIraq - 1 month
|
|Couldn’t avoid his own personal ‘nam
|u/Cumberdick - 1 month
|
|I only got one, but i'm pleasantly surprised how much of a big
|deal it isn't.
|u/yes_no_yes_yes_yes - 1 month
|
|At 26 I’ve got a thru-hike of the PCT planned for next year that will
|require I quit my job and spend six months hiking before kicking off
|the new job search.    Pretty fucking nervous to do it but I’ve had
|a steady job since the day I graduated uni, am ready to try an new
|company, and figure there will be no better time to do something a
|bit crazy.
|u/JackBNimble33 - 1 month
|
|Dude, do it and enjoy it up. If you ever get asked about your
|employment gap in an interview, explain that you walked your ass
|across the country.
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Good luck. Don’t forget to tell us old guys how it went.
|u/jhoffman1844 - 1 month
|
|24 and considering doing the same exact thing within the next year
|or two. Best of luck to you!
|u/yes_no_yes_yes_yes - 1 month
|
|Long-distance permit registration opens up on 10/1 ;)
|u/ChetManley69 - 1 month
|
|As someone that helps with hiring for roles across the country,
|anyone that explains work gaps with something like "biked across
|Spain" or "sailed around the Caribbean" immediately gets moved to
|the interview stage as long as their experience is remotely
|decent. Go for it, it'll be a hell of a time and you'll probably
|be employed again faster than you think.
|u/Melegoth - 1 month
|
|Turning 26 in a week, me and my wife are quitting our jobs,
|apartments and countries to travel the world for 3 years. We'll
|worry about finding a job after that 😁
|u/JuggernautAble3981 - 1 month
|
|Hey, i just wanna say i thru hiked the AT at 26 and it was thr
|e greatest thing i could have ever decided to do. You wont regret
|it. Take your time to live in every moment of it and soak it all
|in. Your only downside is coming back to reality. But you need to
|do it now. Im 35 with a family. I knew the clock was ticking and i
|had to do my hike before all of that, otherwisd i'd never be able
|to get away for that long again. 
|u/baraboosh - 1 month
|
|>Like I should put that on my wall it's funny you say that.
|Look into Memento Mori. Basically the symbolic display of "remember
|that you will die one day"
|u/PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT - 1 month
|
|Absolutely. Also, we should tell em their dicks will leak when they
|get older.
|u/terdferg88 - 1 month
|
|Yeah mid 30s here and wtf no one told me this. I think whoever said
|that flicking it more than twice is playing with it was definitely
|younger.
|u/Wielkimati - 1 month
|
|Wait, are you fucking serious right now? I'm scared.
|u/BeefOnWeck24 - 1 month
|
|im 29 and single with a kush 6 figure job and im about to quit and
|enroll in law school in chicago
|u/Lonely_Ad4551 - 1 month
|
|Make money for sure. However, use your lawyer skills at least a
|couple of times to help someone who really is in need.
|u/BeefOnWeck24 - 1 month
|
|of course i will!
|u/smallmileage4343 - 1 month
|
|Word... good luck!
|u/Itsnotthateasy808 - 1 month
|
|Lol I like how this one is at odds with all the posts saying to max
|out your 401k contributions and plan every step of your life
|u/TheFrontierzman - 1 month
|
|Fiber. Sounds super lame but I swear I wish 20s me paid attention to
|this. When your system is more efficient, so are you. You have way
|more energy and you can think more clearly because you're less sluggish
|and tired. Absolute game changer.
|u/BeingHuman30 - 1 month
|
|Are you talking about flavored ones ? Why would I want to drink it
|...it got so much sugar in it
|u/friend_one - 1 month
|
|Metamucil is seriously a cheat code when it comes to counting
|calories. The fiber feels like a bonus
|u/ayatollahofdietcola_ - 1 month
|
|Also it will reduce your chance of colon cancer We are seeing
|increased rates of colon cancer in younger people, because people
|don’t eat fiber
|u/AzureIsCool - 1 month
|
|Been having Inulin in my coffee and protein shakes just to up my
|fibre intake and feel less hungry overall.
|u/krung_the_almighty - 1 month
|
|Any tips to get more of it? Eat beans.. or cereal for breakfast?
|u/Vex1111 - 1 month
|
|bread potatos bananas oats etc. if you dont like eating any of
|that theres supplements you can take
|u/BHarcade - 1 month
|
|Fiber is also incredibly important for heart health.
|u/n36l - 1 month
|
|50s: Health will deteriorate.
|u/Fake-Podcast-Ad - 1 month
|
|That clicking sound your knee is making isn't a party trick, it's a
|check engine light.
|u/Euphoric-Order8507 - 1 month
|
|Ive had it since i was 8 what do i do to fix it
|u/Eternal_Bagel - 1 month
|
|Gonna need a full rebuild
|u/TheGreatestIan - 1 month
|
|For me, it was working out. Up until I was 35 or 36 my knees
|would click/crinkle or whatever sound when I would squat or put
|any weight on a bent knee. I never worked out. I started working
|out and that all went away.
|u/Euphoric-Order8507 - 1 month
|
|I am currently making good progress on upperbody and arms. I
|will add legs in
|u/yes_no_yes_yes_yes - 1 month
|
|Worth noting that it may be a non-issue.  I do a lot of leg
|work on the regular but have Rice Krispie knees anyway.  So
|long as there’s no pain it’s a nonissue.
|u/skatingandgaming - 1 month
|
|Same. My knees always crackle when I squat, I never have
|knee pain or anything. Still squat heavy weekly without
|issue. People run into joint problems because they’re
|overweight and undertrained, in my experience.
|u/zanydud - 1 month
|
|For me caused from weak hamstrings. Was doing elliptical which
|doesn't exercise hamstring and makes imbalance from quads. When
|it starts clicking I do bent over straight leg lifts and goes
|away within couple days.
|u/Ippus_21 - 1 month
|
|It depends on the click. Synovial fluid cavitating just makes
|noise. It's no more dangerous than popping your knuckles. My knees
|have popped every time I stand up since I was about 16. No pain, no
|damage. If it *hurts* when it clicks, you need to get that checked
|out asap.
|u/Azariah98 - 1 month
|
|People say this all the time, but I never really got it until I got
|here myself. Here goes: Injuries will come back to haunt you. I
|played pickup volleyball several times a week into my mid-30s.
|Sustained a number of ankle injuries. I thought they’d all healed,
|but come my mid-40s, my ankle would just stop working for a couple of
|weeks. I had a lot of problems with my ears as a child. Tubes many
|times, infections, etc. all that cleared up when I grew up. Now I’ve
|developed dry skin inside my ear canals that make them super itchy,
|and I’ve had to learn the hard way that scratching causes more ear
|infections. The repeated ear infections are back worse than ever.
|It just takes longer to heal. A cold you might have gotten over
|completely in 3-4 days in your 20s is now a couple of weeks in my
|late 40s. Taken individually, each one isn’t terrible. When you
|compound them all, it feels like there is something always wrong with
|you.
|u/bynaryum - 1 month
|
|I’ve heard it out this way: if someone in their 20’s was dealing
|with the level of pain and illness of someone in their 50’s, they’d
|think they were dying.
|u/Dedj_McDedjson - 1 month
|
|I'm mid 40's, and 20 year old me would have called in sick with
|the level of pain that is now my background noise.
|u/bynaryum - 1 month
|
|This is exactly it.
|u/Ritchie_Whyte_III - 1 month
|
|In my mid 40s and can confirm.  But you do deal with it better.
|The biggest issue is injuries take forever to heal.  A 6 week
|broken bone or sprain is going to be a 2 year process, and you
|never get back to 100%
|u/_quicdraw_ - 1 month
|
|Not looking forward to my old injuries to come back to haunt me any
|more than they already do (I'm late 30's). Went to orthopedic doc
|recently because I've (still) been having knee issues, since what
|feels like forever. Turns out I have a completely severed ACL,
|double meniscus tear, torn cartilage, bone shard stuck in a tendon,
|and maybe a little bit of early arthritis to boot. He said I
|severed the ACL so long ago that my body has attempted to learn to
|operate without it, so that's cool I guess. Doc told me he's
|surprised I walked into his office with a smile on my face, and
|that if he had the power to, he'd fire every doc I had before him.
|Not surprising, all of the docs before him were military or VA, so
|there's that. Literally all I ever got told by the military was to
|take it easy, wear a brace if I felt like I needed it, and here's a
|prescription for 800mg Ibuprofen. But back to it catching up to
|me... doc also said that I'm at the point where my next knee injury
|basically guarantees a full knee replacement, so I've got that to
|look forward to.
|u/geopede - 1 month
|
|Played some pro football, right about 30 now, wondering how rough
|that’s gonna be. I’m fine at the moment
|u/Lordpoose - 1 month
|
|Look after your teeth! Mid 30s and it’s a crushingly expensive, very
|painful lesson learned.
|u/Disastrous-Net4003 - 1 month
|
|Mid 30s. I'm about $10k into root canals. GO TO THE DENTIST
|u/Ba_Dum_Ba_Dum - 1 month
|
|Almost 60. Wished I’d done a better job.
|u/bonos_bovine_muse - 1 month
|
|You know those obnoxious spots where you bite the inside of your
|lip/cheek and it takes like a week to heal? Only takes a day or two
|if you brush AND FLOSS every night. Sincerely, a dude who was lazy
|about flossing until he had kids and decided he needed to set a
|better example. (don’t dwell on how high the bacterial load must be
|in an unflossed mouth to have that kind of effect… or, hell, maybe DO
|dwell if it’ll get you on the right track!)
|u/amiibohunter2015 - 1 month
|
|Be mindful of coffee and tea, it will stain teeth badly.
|u/Blueguerilla - 1 month
|
|Yeah I’m 46 and wear dentures because I thought my teeth were
|indestructible in my 20s and didn’t take care of them.
|u/HotSaucePalmTrees - 1 month
|
|That toxic partner you are with that you think is the one and you just
|keep trying and trying and trying ... fucking stop. You are in your
|20s. The shit will not work. Move on.
|u/waffelwarrior - 1 month
|
|Took me too long to realize this, way too long. Those last 3 years
|really shouldn't have happened. It was crazy to me that I didn't miss
|her nor feel sad after we broke up, bith immediately after and after
|a while (where most people told me it would be when it hits you for
|real). It really was the best thing to do.
|u/NextFunction - 1 month
|
|Needed to hear this ngl
|u/spencemode - 1 month
|
|Low-cost index funds with regular investment across the life of the
|fund. Reinvest dividends. Keep it to a simple two or three fund
|portfolio so you don’t get overwhelmed.
|u/TheOriginalDoober - 1 month
|
|I know some of those words
|u/aft_punk - 1 month
|
|Invest a moderate amount of money into the S&P or Dow monthly or
|bimonthly. Basically… contribute (max out the company
|contribution if you can) to your 401k, if you have one.
|u/LeadPrevenger - 1 month
|
|Let other people use your money and do your best to not get raked
|over the coals when you cash out
|u/fighter_pil0t - 1 month
|
|And tax shelter it (IRA, 401k, 529, etc)
|u/pseudohistone - 1 month
|
|I have a gripe with how complicated trading & stock terms are. The
|sheer amount of options I have of where to put my money are so
|overwhelming, not to mention how hard it is to save money nowadays.
|Where do I even look to get started? I really want to start
|compounding my money next year.
|u/Midknight226 - 1 month
|
|r/personalfinance has a whole guide If you want the super easy
|version open an account with something like Vanguard or Fidelity.
|Hook up your bank account to transfer money in. Once it's in you
|have to actually invest it now. Most people would say go for
|something like VOO that tracks the S&P500. You could also go for
|one of the retirement year fund and just forget about it. There's
|a million resources online that you should check out though. Don't
|just do what some guy on reddit said.
|u/saucedonkey - 1 month
|
|This should be higher.
|u/Tenocticatl - 1 month
|
|Retirement, life insurance, your balls. If you have access to modern
|healthcare, testicular cancer is very survivable anyway, but if you
|find out early you can avoid chemo. As someone who just barely didn't
|find out early enough I'll say, you *really* don't want the chemo if
|you can help it. It's the second most common type of cancer (after
|breast cancer) and about one in 20 guys gets it, mostly between the
|ages of 20 and 40. So check your balls.
|u/Same_Lack_1775 - 1 month
|
|Came here to say the same thing - if you notice any changes with your
|nuts (pain, size, lump, etc.) go the doctor ASAP. I noticed in
|October and thought it could wait until my physical in
|December...that was probably the difference between diagnosed with
|stage 1 (localized) and stage 3 (in my lungs) which is also the
|difference between an easy surgery and chemo. The chemo sucks. I
|tell my son - if you ever notice anything you go to the doctor the
|same day.
|u/TedW - 1 month
|
|If I went to the doctor every time I noticed something wrong, I'd,
|I'd, well, I'd probably have been to a doctor by now. What's that
|like, anyway?
|u/Tenocticatl - 1 month
|
|The way it was treated by the medical process made the urgency
|pretty clear. The lackadaisical attitude of Dutch GPs is a bit of a
|meme among people who didn't grow up here, but there were only 50
|hours between me first calling my GP and rolling into surgery.
|Confirmation of metastasis a week later, started chemo 10 days
|after that.
|u/Make_It_Sing - 1 month
|
|Hahaha same! The SPEED of the medical system was actually
|frightening and made it more real
|u/yinzer_v - 1 month
|
|And a false alarm is much better than ignoring it. (Found lump,
|ultrasound said it was a cyst. Cyst burst one day, and it had to be
|excised, but much better than ignoring it and it being cancer.)
|u/Mooshan - 1 month
|
|Testicular cancer is not remotely close to being the 2nd most common
|type of cancer. That would be prostate cancer, which is about 1 in 8
|men. Lung and colorectal clock in at about 1/16 and 1/25 people.
|Testicular cancer is like 1/250. *However*, it is the *most* common
|form of cancer for 20 - 40 year old men and the second most common
|for 15 - 19 year old men. *But* very few people, comparatively, get
|any form of cancer at these ages. So, basically, you are very
|unlikely to get ball cancer ever. If you do get cancer at some point,
|it probably won't be ball cancer, it will probably be skin, prostate,
|breast, lung, or butt cancer when you're old. But if you are unlucky
|enough to get cancer when you're 30, there's a good chance it'll be
|ball cancer. So anyway, don't freak out over the spectre of
|testicular cancer lurking around the corner, but fondle your balls
|sometimes just in case.
|u/schacks - 1 month
|
|That time flies and your family doesn’t last forever.
|u/Al12al18 - 1 month
|
|Family not lasting forever is hanging over me like a cloud I’m ngl.
|u/Happy_Ad_983 - 1 month
|
|Same, led to a bit of an anxiety led breakdown at the beginning of
|the year, NGL.
|u/Swaghetti-Yolonaise- - 1 month
|
|This should be number one.
|u/juanzy - 1 month
|
|Save money, but don't make that your entire life goal. Still do things
|with friends, set aside some money for travel and experiences. Give
|yourself a healthy weekly entertainment budget. In your 30s, people
|have families and committed relationships, in your 20s I could rally
|people for a group trip on a week's notice and meet up regularly.
|Sitting out your 20s socially sucks in your 30s.
|u/RandyOfTheRedwoods - 1 month
|
|Yup, if you save 15%, your later years will be just fine. 15%
|probably sounds like a fuck ton right now, but if you do it, you will
|find it’s ok after a few months. Side note: in the first few years
|you will probably have to spend that savings on some serious
|emergency, medical or car issues or something. That’s OK. Think how
|much more stressful these events would have been if you didn’t have
|savings. Do the 401k thing starting in your 30s when you can afford
|to lock the money until retirement.
|u/Life_Level_6280 - 1 month
|
|Pursuing business in your 20s and neglecting other things like friends,
|relationships, mental health, will have consequences that you can’t
|just undo in a few months after you reached your business goals.
|u/btribble - 1 month
|
|Worked my ass off in my 20's-40's. I needed to to provide for the
|family, but I'm never going to get back those missed dinners with the
|wife and kid.
|u/udta_kabbu - 1 month
|
|This. For fuck's sake. When will we teach young adults this thing.
|Thank you for speaking this out.
|u/Keyblades2 - 1 month
|
|Stop chasing being famous or being liked. Stand for what you believe in
|and have some self respect. Do not let your emotions dictate your
|actions.
|u/aygtfs - 1 month
|
|build a life where the baseline is you alone and happy. no one will be
|able to take that away. you will have a good life.
|u/IdealRevolutionary89 - 1 month
|
|Love this, I’m 30 and proud to be building this!
|u/gsl06002 - 1 month
|
|Alternatively, find a partner who makes you happy and allows you your
|alone time. I just took a trip without my wife and it was not as fun
|as it could have been.
|u/chipthamac - 1 month
|
|This is the thing I try to convey to people who are like "find
|happiness in being alone" Sure, I can do that, but I would have
|more fun with someone who is like-minded, that I love, and that
|loves me. Since the day humans walked the Earth, they have
|sought out companionship, and that's not just a coincidence.
|u/BonerSoupAndSalad - 1 month
|
|I met my wife around the time that I became happy on my own. I
|doubt it would’ve worked out otherwise. 
|u/nwfdood - 1 month
|
|I'm 46 and I did this.
|u/DCJustSomeone - 1 month
|
|I did this but accumulated a dog, and now i will outlive them and
|have a huge hole in my life :(
|u/ikmkim - 1 month
|
|It's not a hole. It's a gift. You learn to love unconditionally,
|care for a loved one in their old age, take time out to do things
|like walk around your neighborhood and really "see" it for the
|first time... You learn to process aging, death, appreciating
|small moments and small beauty.  You get to know what it's like
|to have someone irrationally excited when you come home every day.
|It's heartbreaking in the end, yes. But that's life, isn't it? 
|We'll die one way or another, having loved & lost or having not
|loved at all. Which is worse?
|u/mrbubbamac - 1 month
|
|Great advice. It will also (ironically) make it much easier if/when
|you do meet the right person, because they will add to your life
|instead of filling a hole you've created with imaginary expectations.
|Not to get on my soapbox, I was previously engaged and I came home
|and all my fiances stuff was gone and I never saw or spoke to her
|again. Found out about 2 years later she was cheating, just didn't
|have to stones to have a conversation with me. I realized that even
|though I didn't have any closure (I spent a couple years completely
|confused as to why the relationship ended until I ran into a friend
|of a friend who knew), I had to make sure I was comfortable with
|being alone for the rest of my life. Easier said than done. Lot of
|hard work, and I mean that literally . Began taking care of myself,
|going to the gym every day, eating better, pushing myself to learn
|new skills which advanced my career. Also became way more emotionally
|in tune with myself, improved my mental state. And ironically these
|things made dating way way easier, and I stopped looking for someone
|to "fill that hole" and instead lived my life on my terms, and was
|open to finding someone who had a similar attitude but I wasn't
|interested in forcing any relationships just for the sake of not
|being single. Now we are married, we have a life I am truly grateful
|for every day, and that breakup years ago turned out to be the
|greatest gift I ever received!
|u/aygtfs - 1 month
|
|you get it my friend! may the rest of your life continue to be a
|blessing
|u/HistoricallyFunny - 1 month
|
|The only real wealth is your health. Do not trade it, or risk it for
|anything. It is the only thing that stays with you til the end. All
|your relationships, purchases, and most of your memories of your day to
|day life will disappear. Steve Jobs would have been my age now. I have
|near perfect health. How much of his money do you think he would have
|given to have this now, if he had known? ALL OF IT. Health - your life
|- they are the same thing.
|u/EffectSix - 1 month
|
|Greats advice.
|u/jigglyjellly - 1 month
|
|Your generation will have life even harder in the end game financially.
|Don’t be stupid with your money and don’t fuck up your credit score.
|Also, don’t buy things for status.
|u/RoastMalone24 - 1 month
|
|Save at least 10% of your income for retirement (the more the better).
|Also, strength train 2-3 times a week and do cardio a few times a week.
|u/Specific_Club_8622 - 1 month
|
|Take up adult night roller skating if you can. Keeps your body in
|amazing shape and it’s a third place that has a thriving community. I
|skate with people in their 70s!
|u/CherishAlways - 1 month
|
|And don't neglect the lower body! I'm 36 now and am working hard on
|strength and flexibility. Lots of boxes and low-weight squats. I
|spent too much time in my 20s on curls and benchpress.
|u/pfiffocracy - 1 month
|
|Teeth! And build your career from 25-35. Energy levels are not the
|same after 35.
|u/__Z__ - 1 month
|
|>Energy levels are not the same after 35. Thanks for this. I'm 30
|and starting to get my act together.
|u/ManMohana - 1 month
|
|I don't know how useful these advices are. These are mainly regrets.
|The ones who took chances will tell you to be cautious and vice versa.
|The ones who lived their life free will tell you to save for retirement
|and vice versa. No matter what you do ... If your tendency is to
|regret, you will find things to regret later in life. And if your
|personality is to be carefree, you won't spend time looking back. So in
|a way it is refreshing to know ... It doesn't matter much..
|u/OkTry7525 - 1 month
|
|It's not only about regret. Some of these things have no downside and
|so much upside as you age (wear sunscreen, invest in index funds) but
|a lot of people on their 20s just don't give it any thought
|u/FOXlegend007 - 1 month
|
|True but also you can't really invest young since we don't have
|money.Some of my friends (that are also 21) are literally broke
|because they have a lot of necessary expenses. I got 10k cash and
|the rest (15.000) invested in trackers. It's made like 650 euro so
|far. Which is great but honestly when you are young working and
|saving is more important than investing. Also I wear sunscreen but
|I have wrinkles at 21 years old, and I am balding despite taking
|medication haha. It's in my opinion mainly genes, that are in my
|case fcked severely. But it's pretty much all you can do before
|considering surgery which is something you would typically do
|around 3o ig I think if I can say something It would be to finish
|university faster. If you party, sure, party, but also study. So
|that you can start working earlier. You don't have to start working
|you can also run internships (hopefully paid) or study more so you
|can land a good first job or get some good experiences. Just don't
|waste time like me because you cannot balance fun with schoolwork
|and you end up not doing schoolwork AND not having fun.
|u/Parakiet20 - 1 month
|
|Look after your health
|u/lrdwlmr - 1 month
|
|Establish good habits around food, alcohol, spending/saving, and
|exercise now. It’s a lot harder to get a handle on that shit in your
|40s than it is in your 20s.
|u/alek_hiddel - 1 month
|
|The single most important decision you’ll ever make is who to spend
|your life with. Looks fade, and so do warm fuzzy feelings. Find a
|partner who is your best friend, and whom you align with on core
|beliefs and values. I just turned 40 and hit 21 years of marriage.
|My best friend and I are enjoying the benefits of the life we’ve built
|together, and honestly are in coast mode as our investments are paying
|off and life is super easy. I’ve watched waaaay too many friends who
|did not choose wisely have to start over again in their 30’s or later
|when shit fell apart. On a related note, every sexual partner you
|choose has the potential to become your baby mama, especially as
|abortion becomes increasingly difficult to get. Being hot and crazy
|makes for an incredible night of sex, but man it makes for a miserable
|18 years that follow.
|u/dontdoitdoitdoit - 1 month
|
|Great advice and I 2nd everything said (43 M here). I'll add that
|you should really REALLY want kids before you have them. They are
|basically putting life in hard mode. Having said that, I couldn't
|imagine *my life* without my 5 kids!
|u/alek_hiddel - 1 month
|
|My wife is a school teacher, and that 100% helped guide her
|decision. I realized I didn't want kids very early, like by 22
|or 23 I knew it wasn't for me. For a hot minute I honestly
|thought we'd get divorced because she thought she wanted them.
|Then one day she came home from work and was like "being a mom
|sounds like an absolute nightmare, I want my tubes tied".
|u/alek_hiddel - 1 month
|
|1000% My wife and I decided to be childfree after a lot of soul
|searching. I honestly had the best mom in the world, and was
|taught that from the day you have a child you no longer matter.
|Every decision, every ounce of focus should be on that kid. And I
|just didn't want that level of responsibility. As a result, all
|of that love/energy/attention that a kid costs, my wife and I spend
|on each other. 21 years in, and we're honestly still on our
|honeymoon.
|u/SirensbyZel - 1 month
|
|As a 20 year old guy your comments give me so much hope lol. Hope
|to find this some day
|u/alek_hiddel - 1 month
|
|You don’t just find it, you build it. Find someone who you’re
|as compatible as possible with that makes you happy, and build
|a life together. It will require sacrifice on both parts and
|working to stay and grow together. It is truly the most
|rewarding thing in my 40’s on this earth.
|u/SirensbyZel - 1 month
|
|Yeah I mean finding that person 😂 Will keep this in mind for
|sure, thank you!
|u/claymorelove - 1 month
|
|Your looks may fade fast. Take care of yourself. If you’re a womanizer,
|women aren’t going to deal with that shit the uglier you get unless you
|have crazy money. If you find a girl you love, stay with her. That
|shit is rare. The dopamine and porn addiction life can ruin you. Don’t
|let it. There’s not always better. Get therapy.
|u/Exit_Roe - 1 month
|
|Just cause you dated in Highschool doesn’t mean you have to marry them.
|Safe sex and please move out of your hometown. There is so much to see
|and do. You don’t have to have 3 kids by 25 and live down the street
|from your parents. *unless that’s what you really want
|u/afoz345 - 1 month
|
|With the exception of myself and my best friend, all of our friend
|group went to college and now live less than 30 minutes from our
|small hometown (3,300 people) or still in it. They are perfectly
|happy and I’m happy for them. But they never left their comfort zone.
|Since I was 18, I only lived that close once for 4 months. I love
|them, but I could never stay that close.
|u/LushStellarNebula47 - 1 month
|
|start thinking about retirement and investing now, because time flies
|and compound interest is your friend
|u/MontCoDubV - 1 month
|
|Don't focus so much on your career. Work as hard as you need to make as
|much money as you need to support yourself and your family (if
|applicable), but don't grind any harder than that. Your job doesn't
|care about you and never will. The second you are unable to work as
|hard as the standard they've become accustomed to, they'll kick your
|ass to the curb and replace you. And when you're lying on your deathbed
|reflecting back on your life, your job isn't going to be the important
|parts. Focus on the important parts: family, friends, community,
|leisure. Your job supports that part of your life, never let it come
|first.
|u/MisterJasonMan - 1 month
|
|Also, remember that income is only half the picture. Focus just as
|much on frugal, intelligent and purposeful spending as you do on
|increasing your income.
|u/SneeKeeFahk - 1 month
|
|Go brush your teeth, now. Always wash your balls and asshole. If you
|want people to touch it make sure it's clean. Yogo, sign up now and
|praise your functional back and knees in 20 years. Put sunscreen on.
|Start saving for retirement, do it. Exercise, statistically your
|heart is what's going to kill you.
|u/kngofthehill00 - 1 month
|
|Is there dudes out there not washing their fucking assholes? Fucking
|slobs
|u/sky_ryder_001 - 1 month
|
|I just read that in Billy Butcher's voice lmao
|u/PeakWinter6717 - 1 month
|
|Saving money, building a career, and focusing on long-term goals. Enjoy
|the fun, but plan for the future too. 💰💼📈
|u/dolly3900 - 1 month
|
|Their knees, they think that their body will last forever, sorry to
|tell you guys, the knees are the first to go 😜 Saving for the future,
|I'm not talking about putting 20% of your salary away, but a bit here
|and there, get yourself a big bottle for small notes at the end of the
|day, it'll mount up over the years. Pretty much listen to Baz
|Luhrmann, Everybody's free to wear sunscreen. There is so much good
|advice in this.
|u/svkrtho - 1 month
|
|Social media is poison for your attention span. Quit while you can
|and pay attention in school.
|u/Reasonable_Zebra_174 - 1 month
|
|As the wife of a man in that age range, I would like to point out to
|the younger gentleman stop putting so much emphasis on size and focus
|more on skill. If you can keep your partner happy in the bedroom, they
|will be happier over all. But, also put some energy into helping them
|with household responsibilities. Because not helping with the housework
|is usually one of the biggest issues (after intimacy) that people
|complain about in relationship counseling. This I say is not just a
|wife but as couples counselor.
|u/JangusCarlson - 1 month
|
|Protect your hearing. Workout as much as you can.
|u/Psigun - 1 month
|
|Get your retirement plan started and dialed in. Compound interest will
|help you most at the youngest possible age. Figure out how your
|pension, 401k, IRA, etc. works so you can maximize them. Or whatever
|the retirement plan of your desired career field is and how it works if
|you don't have one yet. It'll save future you a lot of stress and
|save you a lot of good years versus struggling to get up to speed in
|middle age for less benefit.
|u/Veetupeetu - 1 month
|
|Find a good partner with whom you two fulfill each other for a long
|time. I am so proud of her in every possible way after 38 years
|together.
|u/Troubador222 - 1 month
|
|Your hearing. Especially if you use ear pods or head phones and play
|your music loud. It can and does take a toll. Tinnitus seems to be a
|growing issue.
|u/SweetMaryMcGill - 1 month
|
|The long term effects of alcohol, pot, and violence. Deciding what
|kind of man you want to be, what kind of partner and parent you want to
|be and what you need to be doing today, this week, this month, this
|year to get there. Taking responsibility for your own actions and their
|consequences, for you and others.
|u/TW-RM - 1 month
|
|It's amazing how quickly exceptions to normal rules go out the window
|if one has a high credit score/income. Had loan requirements
|completely thrown out because the bank wanted me to sign.
|u/TheMagnuson - 1 month
|
|Start stretching now. Only takes a few minutes a day. I stretch for 5
|minutes after I wake up and for 5 minutes before I go to bed. Makes a
|difference in how I feel and how I sleep. Take care of your teeth.
|Use a dentist recommended mouthwash. Brush 2-3 times a day. Dentist
|wants you to floss. I don’t cause I’m lazy, but I do keep up on mouth
|washing and brushing. Exercise consistently. You feel good now. You
|feel strong now. You have all the energy you need now. It won’t stay
|that way if you don’t stay in shape. Once you hit your 30’s that whole
|“naturally in shape” thing goes out the window. So start now.
|Lieterally even if it’s just 20 minutes, just get some exercise
|consistently, like 4-5 times a week. Mix up some cardio with strength
|training. You don’t need to get ripped, just stay active and work up a
|sweat for 20-30 minutes a day. Learn to be patient. Patience is a
|virtue. Things will not happen according to your personal schedule.
|Romance, career, pay, getting that car or house or whatever is gonna
|take time and won’t happen based on your personal schedule. Be
|patient. Be respectful. Be thoughtful in the things that you do and
|say. Shit will work out eventually if you are patient, respectful,
|thoughtful, and keep working at your goals. Just be patient.
|u/Dirtybojanglez904 - 1 month
|
|Make sure you develop emotionally. Most male culture is so absent of
|emotional development because in the past we could pull women based on
|our income and social status. Now women have their own money and
|social status but dudes don't know how to interact with women without
|tryna fuck em.
|u/Exact-Part-6645 - 1 month
|
|You will realize that you are only young for a "part" of your life and
|you are older for the rest of it. I would make decisions that favor
|the "rest" of your life. That's not to say don't have fun being young,
|my advice is ask yourself if your older self would approve of any
|decisions that you make when you're young because you will quickly
|become that person.
|u/vinnybawbaw - 1 month
|
|Your 20’s are not the peak of your life. Don’t fall into disrespectful
|discourse and attitude towards others. There’s no such things as a
|"real man" or an alpha male.
|u/Hann_Dredd - 1 month
|
|These two things are huge and what I would change if I could go back.
|And they’re foundational to pretty much anything you want to do in
|life, whether it’s get married and have kids and a career, or whether
|you want to be single and travel the world, or anything. HABITS!!
|Eating, sleeping, planning, working out, etc. Your quality of life in
|your 40s and beyond will be directly related to the habits you make and
|work in your 20s. Cut out the shitty eating, exercise, learn new stuff,
|do hard things. Make a plan and work your plan. Daily, yearly, and 5
|years. Don’t get distracted by things that don’t fulfill your plan.
|This is my biggest regret. If you don’t have a vision for where you
|want to be, you’ll stick your head up when you’re 40 and think, “hold
|on…I don’t want to be here.”
|u/Flotack - 1 month
|
|If you find a dynamite person you’re passionate about and love spending
|time with, don’t be dissuaded from making a commitment because of the
|“paradox of choice.” I live in a major city with seemingly endless
|dating options, but apps have ruined romantic endeavors for me because
|the whole thing feels so cheap and boxed, in a way. It’s gotten to the
|point that unless I’m like suuuuuper craving some human interaction
|with a stranger, I won’t date anyone that I didn’t meet at a normal,
|real social function before. (I say this as someone who fucked up with
|the love of his life and regrets it almost every single day.)
|u/BitcoinMD - 1 month
|
|Get all of the education you ever want to get before you have a family
|u/See_Bee10 - 1 month
|
|Time will dominate starting capital when it comes to investments, so
|start early even if you start small. If you put $10 a month into an S&P
|ETF every month of your 20s you'll have about $53,000 in your
|retirement account when you are 65. Doing the same thing in your 30s
|will only make you $21,000. Roth IRAs are your best friend when you
|don't make much money.
|u/Criseyde2112 - 1 month
|
|Bank your sperm and get a vasectomy. Make sure any children you have
|are your careful, thoughtful decision, with the right woman. Nothing
|will ruin your life for years like an unplanned pregnancy or a
|pregnancy with the wrong woman.
|u/Dangerous-Style7199 - 1 month
|
|What women are saying.
|u/Youbettereatthatshit - 1 month
|
|Have fun but plan for the future. Don’t delay getting all of the
|education you need, because it’s really hard to go back for that
|masters/phd. Being alone in your 40’s isn’t as cool as being alone in
|your 20’s. A wife and kids isn’t lame, and in my 30’s, I feel much
|more put together than my single coworkers. Honestly there is zero envy
|to be single.
|u/GeneralZaroff1 - 1 month
|
|Listening before demanding to be heard. I don’t mean to strangers on
|the internet or influencers, but real people in your lives. A lot of
|men in their 20s tell me they’re lonely but when I ask them how often
|they reach out to other men to hang out, and HEAR what others are going
|through, they usually say not often. Then, they complain that it’s hard
|to find friends.
|u/AnybodySeeMyKeys - 1 month
|
|1. Forming habits around health. Namely, taking care of it. Guys in
|their twenties think they're immortal. Yet how you eat now and how you
|take care of your body will determine your health and happiness as you
|age. 2. Forming habits around money. Guys in their twenties blow
|their money like a pimp to live. If you salt away $50 a month in a 401k
|in your 20s, you won't believe how much that will total by the time you
|hit your 60s. Compound interest is the most powerful force in the
|universe. Learn how money and investing works now. 3. Don't be a
|slave to your appetites. Many a guy has wound up writing 18 years of
|child support checks to a woman they didn't particularly like. Why?
|Because they thought having an orgasm is the most important thing in
|the universe. 4. While taking care of your body and finances, don't
|forget your mind. If you haven't read a book since the day you
|graduated, it's time to start. Cultivate interests. Try new things. For
|the love of all that's holy, don't be the dumb slob who just camps out
|in front of the video game console or ESPN night after night. Those
|things are fun and good. But they are not life. 5. Don't have a job.
|Have a career. Even if you don't have a degree, you can learn new
|things and pick up new skills. Your ability to constantly adapt, to
|always be called on as reliable, to be able to keep pace with the ever-
|changing demands of your chosen field, will be the difference between
|making a decent living and barely scraping by.
|u/Capster11 - 1 month
|
|Relax. None of it really matters. We all end up in the same place in
|the end.
|u/Retiddereromeno - 1 month
|
|Realize that Medical Knowledge is not progressing fast enough to allow
|you to indulge in your vices continually. Be it tobacco, alcohol, or
|bacon cheeseburgers. TAKE CARE OF YOUR TEETH ALSO.
|u/-mister_oddball- - 1 month
|
|Start a pension and put as much as you can into it. You will be mid 50s
|before you know it and having no finance in place for retirement is a
|horrible place to be. (Started mine at 21,only sane decision I made in
|my early youth!)
|u/garry4321 - 1 month
|
|That weekly/daily drinking, that you know; you can totally stop
|whenever you want? That drinking you do cause hey youre in your 20's
|having fun, you'll cut back later? Later often never comes or comes
|after its too late.
|u/Raudoxer - 1 month
|
|Stop watching porn.
|u/easy10pins - 1 month
|
|Porn is not reality. Stop expecting women to act like porn stars do.
|A date doesn't automatically mean sex.
|u/creatively_annoying - 1 month
|
|Travel far, it's much cheaper if you're happy with cheap food,
|accommodation and trains/buses. See the world. Invest in short term
|funds too, even a few euros a month for 5-10 years that you can't
|touch. Most important start a pension.
|u/Rogerwills88 - 1 month
|
|Lose weight and stop smoking now.
|u/Chutson909 - 1 month
|
|Posture
|u/tilldeathdoiparty - 1 month
|
|Brush, floss and visit your dentist more. But seriously floss, it is
|a life changing experience not having to worry about your breath and
|can spot others who don’t pretty quick. Meat starts stinking bad
|within an hour when it’s caught in your teeth, if you haven’t flossed
|in a month, just think of that rotting against your gums and teeth
|u/nohairday - 1 month
|
|The heat death of the universe.
|u/DeepSpaceOG - 1 month
|
|Don’t worry I’m doing everything I can to delay it
|u/EveryDayA_Struggle - 1 month
|
|Your body can stop working at any time, you don't know if you'll be
|that unlucky sod. Make sure you leave time in your life for you and
|being free. You're still young! I'm 30 and haven't gone for a run
|since I was 21 because i can't anymore. Chronic pain came out of
|nowhere
|u/EveryDayA_Struggle - 1 month
|
|Started at 21 😅 I had to deal with "you're too young" for a bit
|until I was finally taken seriously. They still don't know what's
|wrong with me but I at least have pain killers and stretches
|u/amiibohunter2015 - 1 month
|
|When I was in my late last teens I ran and was one of the top of the
|gym class in running. Then I got shin splints.
|u/ThomasLomeo26 - 1 month
|
|m43 long term. how you treat women and how you approach sex matters.
|your health is incredibly important. i look around the gym and some of
|the younger guys... i could run circles around them. the women run from
|them and they are loud. long term. long term. long term. 🫶💪
|u/fiblesmish - 1 month
|
|Don't be an asshole. Men are often angry and full of unwarranted
|opinions based on nothing at all. In other words an asshole. Or man.
|If you live there are greater and greater chances you will run into
|people again. And if they simply know you as "that asshole". They will
|dismiss you out of hand. You will need people. For something. So try
|to get through life with as little unneeded bad feelings as possible.
|Most things most men get pissy about are of no real consequence in the
|grand scheme of life. You don't have to be a fawning suckhole. But
|please and thank you go a long way to ease future interactions. And
|this is from a lifelong asshole. Only recently trying mend my ways.
|u/Fishtoart - 1 month
|
|Women are human beings, just like you.
|u/dizzsouthbay - 1 month
|
|The actual consequences for most of the stuff we do in our
|twenties/early thirties and how all the things you were sure were right
|and just and needed to be said sound so much more annoying and smug
|coming out of the mouths of people younger than you are. And then
|realizing you were almost certainly exactly that annoying and smug. It
|honestly sucks because unless tragedy strikes you’ve honestly got a
|literal lifetime to go back and dwell on regrets and witness your own
|faults through the eyes and experiences of others. I’m sure healthy
|people are able to compartmentalize and live their lives happily
|anyway. Unfortunately some like myself let past mistakes run on a loop
|inside the brain theater…
|u/cdub2046 - 1 month
|
|As a man in his 50’s I can’t emphasize enough, start a plan for
|retirement. That means put money aside, take care of your body and
|continue to be curious. Part one: if you can, find a job with a
|pension. If you can’t get that 401k and look into some type of long
|term investing. Nothing worse than having to work when you’re older and
|don’t want to. I was fortunate enough to get a union job with
|retirement benefits and I worked all the overtime I could when I was
|young and full of energy. I now have the luxury to work when I want as
|I wait out the clock to full retirement Part two: take care of your
|body by stretching, lifting weights and getting good eating habits. As
|you get older health issues will come up. But doing the things I
|mentioned you can stave off the worst of them. And part three: be
|curious. Have hobbies, keep learning and exploring. Nothing worse than
|hearing an old timer with nothing to talk about besides their ailments.
|And the more you stimulate your brain the longer it stays around.
|u/Wareagle206 - 1 month
|
|Stop drinking if you even think you might have a problem.
|u/netman18436572 - 1 month
|
|No need for a new iPhone every year. Don’t worry about FOMO.
|Recognize your true friends from your acquaintances.
|u/withurwife - 1 month
|
|Fix your mental health. Reddit has this idea that 30+ means deaths
|door, and that's a shitty way to live the rest of your life.
|u/Wrevellyn - 1 month
|
|Your mental health. If you're stressing out at work or home on the
|regular, and you have any kind of undiagnosed mental health issue, bite
|the bullet and talk to someone. If you qualify for government
|assistance for mental healthcare, take advantage of it. If you can
|afford it, buy it. If neither.. I don't know. This isn't a "you're
|running out of time" type of thing, this is a "you could be a lot
|happier than you are" type of thing.
|u/spacester - 1 month
|
|The top comment is about hearing and I am going to say "listening".
|u/TheMadIrishman327 - 1 month
|
|You are in your sexual prime. Don’t waste your best fucking years
|playing video games and ignoring your girlfriend. Make love to her for
|hours. Look at job changing opportunities more often. Keep trading up
|job wise. Don’t kill yourself working for an employer. They don’t
|value the long hours and extra work. They’ll never value that time like
|the other people in your life will. Use wax paper when you microwave
|stuff. It’s easier and cleaner all the way around. Save early. 100%
|participation in 401k. Avoid credit card debt. You don’t build wealth
|by paying financial institutions interest. Don’t get serious with a
|potential partner who has different views on money than you do. If they
|habitually piss away all of their money, they’ll happily piss away all
|of yours when you’re a couple.
|u/movieguy95453 - 1 month
|
|Contribute to your 401k or open an IRA account. Every dollar you save
|in your 20s will be worth significantly more than in your 40s or 50s.
|u/MRToddMartin - 1 month
|
|Being kind and nice and not thinking that equates to thumbs up or likes
|or views.
|u/Eodbatman - 1 month
|
|Start saving for retirement in your 20s. You do not have the time you
|think you have.
|u/Taueron - 1 month
|
|Take care of your oral care, hearing, skin, and eyes. Looks fade, make
|sure your partner is someone you get along with.
|u/tattooedpanhead - 1 month
|
|Read more and watch TV and movies less. TV least of all I through mine
|out. And get outside in nature once in a while. And forgive me but
|don't get hooked on porn. Shits harder to kick than anything. 
|u/d00vinator - 1 month
|
|Anger is wasted energy.
|u/Pristine_Concern6467 - 1 month
|
|Quit smoking
|u/imadeacrumble - 1 month
|
|Women are people. Not playthings.
|u/joelkeys0519 - 1 month
|
|Saving for retirement.
|u/SolidLikeIraq - 1 month
|
|I’m 41 and my nephew who is 22 moved in with me 2 years ago. He
|doesn’t do much besides work and hang out on his phone. Listen. Your
|20’s can be about almost anything you want. Early 20’s are genuinely
|the first opportunity to discover yourself as a man. You get to go
|screw up a bit, learn lessons, figure out which of the things you
|believed as an “early adult” actually hold up to scrutiny. You need
|to go and explore. You will be 30 and 40 before you know it. Now is
|the time to go do the thing. Jump on the fucking struggle bus and find
|out how to embrace the suck - because that suck is likely going to be
|some of the most impactful time of your entire life. And here’s the
|best part - most of the decisions you make in your twenties won’t have
|a massive impact on you when you’re 40. Some will - 100% some will. But
|at 20 you can really fuck up and learn. Go adventure. Do not live
|someone else’s life. We only get one swing on this rope, you better
|fucking make it count.
|u/C_Wags - 1 month
|
|Go to the dentist! Make an appointment. Today. I can assure you it will
|be cheaper and less painful than a root canal in your 30s.
|u/Wlmar1 - 1 month
|
|57 here. Yes, retirement is something you should consider in your
|20's. Yes, your 20's is the time to take risks with your career and
|find yourself. Yes, get in good shape in your 20's because it will pay
|off in your 50's by not being overweight or injured. But honestly, the
|thing you should consider in your 20's is embracing your relationship
|with your parents. They're not as dumb as you think. They're not as out
|of step as you think. They understand you better than you know. And
|they'll be gone before you know it. I would do anything to have mine
|back, even for a day.
|u/ConclusionEastern592 - 1 month
|
|Take care of your back and knees ! In your 20, you can take anything
|without consequences. But trust, there are consequences. 20 or years
|later. So protection pads and lift with your back straight.
|u/Pretend_Tea6261 - 1 month
|
|Date around but choose the right woman before you get too old as it is
|much harder the older you get to meet people. Save money towards
|acquiring assets as soon as your debts are paid off. Financial
|stability and the right woman are the 2 pillars of success. The third
|one is maximize your health and fitness. Keep fit and eliminate
|drinking alcohol and smoking,junk food etc.
|u/Spin_Me - 1 month
|
|No one is going to take care of you : Stay in good shape. Active
|lifestyles foster social activities with other active adults. Active,
|healthy adults tend to be affluent, which means you will socialize with
|high achievers. It's a double benefit. Start saving now and pay off
|your student loans quickly and creatively. Doing so clears the deck for
|you to accelerate your retirement savings, enabling you to retire
|"early."
|u/B0ngoZ0ngo - 1 month
|
|At the end of the day you will value the quality time you have spent
|with beloved ones (be it parents, spouse, kids, siblings,partners,
|friends) a lot more than a "career" or material goods. Relationships
|are a lot more valuable than money. Forgiving is more important than
|ego.
|u/snowman-1111 - 1 month
|
|If you’re considering getting married and having kids before 35, think
|hard.
|u/InSanerOne - 1 month
|
|Be more confident. No one else actually knows what they're doing
|either.
|u/WorcesterRulez69 - 1 month
|
|Enjoy a taut ballsack
|u/wlane13 - 1 month
|
|2 things... 1. Learn to take care of your body while your body is
|still able to rebound and change for the better... the older you get,
|the less your body will be as easy to "fix".... take care of yourself
|dude. 2. I dont care if you are straight or gay or somewhere in
|between... the looks will fade, the sex will become less important...
|pick someone as a partner that you genuinely enjoy spending time doing
|NOTHING with... because that is the real life, and at the end of the
|day it really is most important that your wife/husband/partner is your
|best friend. **EDIT** One more thing... 3. NO ONE older really had
|it all figured out until they got older... your parents just made it
|all up as they went along. Forgive them for their honest mistakes and
|just know that in the end we are all just trying to survive and
|advance.
|u/Pikkow81 - 1 month
|
|Learn to reflect. Doesn’t have to be deep long meditation. Train
|yourself to be able to spend ten to fifteen seconds to put your
|attention on yourself at any time. Learn to live instead of react.
|u/Vandermeerr - 1 month
|
|Take care of your posture.
|u/ballskindrapes - 1 month
|
|You really get hit hard when you leave your twenties and realize the
|wold isn't catering to you anymore. They are catering to the new 20
|year Olds now
|u/nimrod823 - 1 month
|
|Stay active. Stay healthy. Take care of yourself in every way you can.
|Take your mental, emotional and physical health seriously. It will only
|make your life easier as you get older.
|u/sjl1983 - 1 month
|
|Life comes at ya fast.
|u/RedOakActual - 1 month
|
|Qualities in women besides looks.
|u/Hoosier_Daddy68 - 1 month
|
|Your dick is a liar, stop listening to it.
|u/Lopsided-Use6617 - 1 month
|
|Nothing. Just continue like any other twenty year old. Savings,
|prioritising mental health etc will come in time. Enjoy the time when
|you can. It won’t be the same later.
|u/juliohernanz - 1 month
|
|Agree. I'm on the wrong side of my sixties and if i would've done
|things differently I may be better physically now but I don't regret
|having done what I did.
|u/sretep66 - 1 month
|
|Saving and investing. I spent every dime I made in my 20s. Didn't get
|serious about living within my means and investing until my 30s. Using
|the "Rule of 72", at a 7.2% average annual gain I could have doubled
|my net worth 1 more time before I retired. Instead of being
|comfortable, I could be wealthy now.
|u/ca1ibos - 1 month
|
|They should consider how stupid they look with their moustaches that
|make them look like 70’s/80’s Pedo’s! LOL.
|u/Grimm2020 - 1 month
|
|Many of you may have families and daughters, truly one of life's
|pleasures. I wish I had treated females better than I did in my later
|teens and twenties.
|u/onyerleftovers - 1 month
|
|You're wasting time taking all of those pictures and videos of
|yourself. No one cares. Go learn how to do something and stop fucking
|recording everything.
|u/blackmobius - 1 month
|
|Your poor health choices in your teens and twenties needs to be
|rectified by your thirties or else you start having permanent
|consequences. Poor sugar laden diet? Diabetes. Staying in the sun all
|day? Skin cancer. Up playing video games 14 hours a day and all night
|every night? Carpal Tunnel. You can rebound easily in your early life,
|but towards the middle onward, poor health choices, especially joints
|and teeth, have consequences
|u/BeardMonk1 - 1 month
|
|Look after yourself. Exercise and good diet. You don't have to live
|like a monk. You can still go for wild nights out etc, but invest in
|your body. Your only going to get one and the better shape it's in, the
|better the ride.
|u/Outrageous_Flow_6666 - 1 month
|
|Experiences are more important than material wealth.
|u/sumitmsn2 - 1 month
|
|Career, Upskilling, more importantly savings. They are spending too
|much on items they dont need just for the sale of fitting in society.
|Also focus on health, please move and dont be a couch potato.
|u/A_Gray_Old_Man - 1 month
|
|Stop drinking alcohol Start saving for retirement Exercise some
|every day
|u/tobywillow - 1 month
|
|Wear ear protection
|u/VegasLife84 - 1 month
|
|Roth IRA and fitness. And by fitness I don't mean "throwing up as much
|weight as you can". I fell into that trap, and my joints are paying
|for it.
|u/protomanEXE1995 - 1 month
|
|I opened a Roth IRA at age 24 because the universal answer to this
|question is always "start saving for retirement early." I don't have a
|ton of money in there but it's still more than what I'd have if I never
|opened it.
|u/Nerdymcbutthead - 1 month
|
|Look after your back.
|u/turbodude69 - 1 month
|
|i'm gonna go with everyone else. retirement account. even if it's just
|$10 a week, just keep adding money, especially if your company matches
|it.
|u/joeyblove - 1 month
|
|Preventing back pain.
|u/Kungfufuman - 1 month
|
|Health in general. Those injuries you get (broken bones, hard hits,
|concussions, whiplash) all come back to haunt you. I do not want these
|things to stop you from doing things but do them a little less
|stupidly.
|u/D4GR - 1 month
|
|I just turned 30 and have some coworkers in the early twenties. If I
|could impart them with anything it’s “Be careful of creating problems
|someone else has to fix later.”
|u/highcaliberwit - 1 month
|
|Stay fit, stay clean, sex isn’t the goal of a relationship.
|u/SignificantCell218 - 1 month
|
|I know this is going to suck to hear but don't think you're invincible
|don't think you can play fast and loose responsibilities and
|consequences. Will catch up to you take good care of yourselves,
|mentally and physically. At some point in the future you will have a
|family and it will be your responsibility to take care and provide for
|that family. Don't jeopardize your rights by being reckless. Also dip
|your toes into politics. Pay attention because the policies you vote
|for in your twenties will affect you when you're older and they will
|affect your children. Don't be misguided or misled by propaganda do
|your own research. Investigate and worry about the things that are
|going to adversely affect your future and the future of your loved
|ones. Don't vote for somebody because of their skin color or what's in
|between their legs or whether they have a good personality because it's
|not about that. It's about what they can do to make this country a
|sustainable place for you and your loved ones
|u/padraigtherobot - 1 month
|
|All that drinking really isn’t worth it.
|u/ecobear86 - 1 month
|
|Stay away from Alcohol.
|u/Kabalos - 1 month
|
|Consider not drinking.
|u/Surfing_Ninjas - 1 month
|
|You don't realize how easy it is to get in shape and stay in shape when
|youre still young. If you've been putting off getting in shape for any
|reason, stop putting it off and start today. You don't need to run
|miles or do sprints or join crossfit, even just walking a half mile or
|a mile every day is a great way to start and will keep your body from
|breaking down as you get older. When you're young many people are
|pushed to exercise, whether it's gym class or walking around town with
|friends or being in sports, but when you're an adult many people switch
|to a completely sedentary life because no one is pushing them to do
|otherwise. It's a common misconception that exercise has to be a
|miserable part of life that you have to force yourself to do.
|u/laosurvey - 1 month
|
|No major injury truly heals. It will come back to you.
|u/Spinach_Typical - 1 month
|
|Being able to be still. The world is alot of doing, and it usually (but
|not always) takes challenges and stresses to realise there need to be a
|balance between 'doing' and 'being'. 'Being' is such a wonderful
|dimension to bring into your life situation, and brings better health,
|direction, creativity and peace.
|u/DucktapeCorkfeet - 1 month
|
|Their health. That bird will come back to roost. You are not
|invincible!
|u/Western_Mud8694 - 1 month
|
|How to live independently
|u/Tasty-Development930 - 1 month
|
|Shit sucks when you get older go to therapy now dude trust me I'm
|dealing with shit so fucked but dude ya gotta go
|u/TheSharkFromJaws - 1 month
|
|Spend time with the people you love now. There will be a time when you
|start getting less wedding and baby shower invitations and more funeral
|notifications.
|u/l_rufus_californicus - 1 month
|
|Watch your heart health. All the alcohol and food of questionable
|utility you consume now are withdrawals from your quality of life
|later, and medication can’t fix everything.
|u/Sirlyhippo - 1 month
|
|care about hearing maybe turn it down a bit take care of your feet
|good shoes are worth it you need to seriously think about marriage and
|children. kids can be the absolute best thing in the world but if your
|hitched to a lazy or mean wife your life will suck. even the bible
|warns of a nagging wife, better live on the corner of a roof and all
|but seriously when you see your girlfriend react to stress thats truth
|so if you really want to know what another person is all about stop
|talking and watch they will show you. and make the hard choice a good
|woman will elevate you beyond what you ever thought possible, a bad
|wife will make every day a trial and wear you down to nothing. social
|media and porn are killing the human race slowly kick it now and live a
|real life before it makes everyone crazy
|u/Orlando1701 - 1 month
|
|Being broke stops being sexy when you turn 30, and “sigma grindset”
|from grifters pushing courses online isn’t how you achieve fiscal
|stability. So very many of my friends from high school and college
|going “holy shit I’m 45 years old and have absolutely nothing set aside
|for retirement.” And take care of your physical fitness. So many of
|my friends in their 40s are falling apart while I don’t have any
|serious health issues and I just do 3-4 hrs of weights a week and 2-3
|hrs of cardio.
|u/Nitroburner3000 - 1 month
|
|For me it was diet. I ended up with three completely clogged arteries
|and my heart attacked without mercy. I barely made it and it was no
|fun. Pizza isn’t THAT good.
|u/CausticRegards - 1 month
|
|Daily alcohol use will fuck up nearly everything you want out of life
|u/Efficient_Falcon_402 - 1 month
|
|That they will some day be in their 30s 40s 50s 60s .... I'm not just
|clowning , they really never consider it until it's too late.
|u/bubbameister1 - 1 month
|
|If you aren't happy by yourself, you won't be happy with someone else
|for very long. Live by yourself for a bit if you can. Learn to be by
|yourself.
|u/gabaiel - 1 month
|
|I’m in my 40s but I was lucky to have spent my youth surrounded by
|older people that shared a few things that shaped how I see the world
|today. - “Make haste slowly”. Take your aspirations seriously and be
|mindful that it takes a LONG TIME to achieve meaningful things. It’s
|all hard work. Be persistent, be consistent and show up for your future
|self every day. - “Decide if you want to be a millionaire or if you
|just want to spend a million bucks”, “what makes you rich is not what
|you buy, it’s what you save” and “a box full of valuables don’t chime
|when shaken”. Don’t get yourself in financial trouble to impress
|others. People that are impressed by this kind of things aren’t usually
|worth keeping around anyway. - “Get rid of bad company” Make sure to
|choose well your friends. Surround yourself with people that take real
|enjoyment in your successes (as small as they are) and vice versa.
|People that are around to help you and build you up and that you fell
|great about helping and building up too. Get rid of bad company. Get.
|Rid. Of. Bad. Company. (Edit: formatting)
|u/New_Transition8925 - 1 month
|
|School/Career. If you don’t take it seriously in your 20s it makes
|later decades awfully hard.
|u/Financial_Temporary5 - 1 month
|
|Stop gaming and go outside.
|u/Senter_Focus - 1 month
|
|Take pictures of your friends and family. You'll appreciate looking
|back as your memory fades a bit.
|u/Bowserbob1979 - 1 month
|
|You don't have to be so fucking macho. Pace yourself and think about
|your back. It looks cool as hell when you lift that heavy thing, but
|your back will thank you later in life that you had someone help you
|lift it.
|u/Aggravating-Duck-552 - 1 month
|
|Find a way to travel and stay in hostels. Best experience of my life
|was meeting people from all over the world.
|u/serene_brutality - 1 month
|
|The future. I see so many guys in their 20’s, while many do have a
|plan, are going to college and stuff, engaging in foolishness that is
|really going to hinder them or cause some pain later. All work and no
|play does indeed make Jack a dull boy, but moderation. Squandering
|money on partying too much, or buying useless/unnecessary stuff with
|money that should be saved/invested. Dude should be putting money in a
|401k now but instead he’s buying the new, hot video game system, more
|car/truck than he needs and it’s not even a hobby or passion, he’s just
|tryna flex, look good to smash more puss. Which is the next error,
|they’re causing pain to themselves and other people by constantly
|chasing tail, increase their body count, look like a stud. They got one
|chick they actually like but the more the merrier so they’re going
|after more just for fun. Then that causes the girl issues, they get
|dropped and feel like a POS (cuz they are) because the “girl they love
|don’t wan them anymore.” Not to mention ending up with STD’s like
|chlamydia, herpes, HPV and child support. Lots of this stuff will
|naturally happen with the best of intentions, but most of it can be
|avoided if they stop and think, look at the most logical way it’s going
|to play out, and just don’t. But they too often get all “YOLO” and end
|up screwing themselves over.
|u/kingleonidas1983 - 1 month
|
|You’re going to get fat if you don’t work out.
|u/Lower-Programmer1115 - 1 month
|
|Your behavior in your 20’s has consequences beyond your 20’s.
|u/PsychonautAlpha - 1 month
|
|Learn to be a good listener. Your relationships will eventually suffer
|if you don't learn to meet the needs of your partner, and that starts
|with learning to listen.
|u/Accomplished_Look_13 - 1 month
|
|Having a wife that is your best friend and is sane and just a nice
|person. It is everything. The understanding, the closeness and the
|uniqueness of it. Not many people have that. No bridezillas, no money
|grip shit. A true team player that is on your side. There is nothing,
|and I mean NOTHING, like it. Friends come and go. When they get a S.O.
|they fade. If you can open up, share and feel like you can be yourself,
|and she is cool with it, you are there. 2 things. Always be considerate
|in bed and everywhere else, and do not cheat on this rare woman. It is
|a beautiful thing.
|u/Yarl85 - 1 month
|
|You are not invincible. Take care of yourself. Injured
|bones/joints/muscles hurt A LOT more as you get older.
|u/CeleritasSqrd - 1 month
|
|Old guy observation - most of your friends from your twenties are
|idiots. But that's ok, knowing that will help later on. Some of the
|idiots will never mature - avoid them, they'll be shit magnets forever.
|u/Femboy-Isshiki - 1 month
|
|I'm 25 and waiting to get all of my teeth pulled and replaced with
|implant supported dentures. Brush twice a day and don't be a drug
|addict for 6 years.
|u/uthillygooth - 1 month
|
|The 40’s are where you find out you wish you hadn’t lifted so heavy.
|Edit : to clarify, as mentioned in comments, I’m talking about ego-
|lifting.
|u/X-AE-AXII - 1 month
|
|Lifting weights are good for getting older right?
|u/seanbluestone - 1 month
|
|So much so that I'd say the opposite of OP- you'll wish you lifted
|heavy as you get older because it directly and indirectly protects
|against fucking everything from osteoperosis to increased hba1c. I
|think the sentiment OP might be alluding to is probably to avoid
|injury but that's very different to avoiding heavy weights. Spend
|time and effort on good form and don't go heavier than you can
|manage, but absolutely lift heavy, the health and longevity
|benefits across the board are huge.
|u/KUjayhawker - 1 month
|
|Yes, absolutely. What OP, and others, are alluding to is the
|irresponsible ego-lifting many 20-something’s do. Poor recovery
|habits lead to injury. You can train with heavy weights at any
|age. You just have to be smart about it.
|u/Niniva73 - 1 month
|
|Everybody knows joints are fragile, but I've seen what inverted sit
|ups do. Twice. For all that's good and holy, avoid them at all
|costs, lest you wake up one morning with a football bulging between
|your abs. And I've also spent plenty of time taking knots out of
|backs -- using my full weight on the points of my elbows -- because
|people overworked their pecs for years at a time. WTH, dudes, a
|little balance, maybe?
|u/Particular_Care6055 - 1 month
|
|Actually the opposite of this is true. Use it or lose it, the earlier
|you start lifting the better. Absolutely listen to your body and
|avoid unnecessary extremes, but I'm only 24 and my body is fucked
|because I *haven't* lifted heavy.
|u/jvstxno - 1 month
|
|Edit: Talk to more women. Approach them. Have more sex. Guys in their
|20s are having less sex nowadays than guys over 30 and it leads to a
|lot of horrible men doing horrible things.
|u/OkTry7525 - 1 month
|
|You're getting ahead of yourself. Recent surveys indicated 45% of
|single straight men in their 30s never approach women IRL. So, talk
|to women.
|u/chriztuffa - 1 month
|
| "bros before hos" is generañly bad advice for any man post college. if
|yoy find a good partner you should prioritize her over your friends
|u/4th_chakra - 1 month
|
|That they will age, and not be able to work, so then what? I know
|people who simply cannot retire because they can't afford to. And
|given today's economy, trying to save *anything* can be impossible.
|Some of those people are also in poor health, mentally and physically
|exhausted, and are alone without any outside support system. So
|consider your future self. The self that isn't a vibrant, healthy,
|fun-loving young adult without a care in the world. Because we all
|age. We all come to that point where we are not able to do what we
|used to do, because our bodies and minds are failing. And if you read
|that, and dismissed it.. I also understand that. Why would that be a
|consideration, when it's forever away, far far off in a future you may
|never see. I thought that as well. You need to take care of *you*,
|which includes your future you. Kicking yourself later isn't helpful.
|Planning for your eventual future is.
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